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I don’t think you will stop laughing at this
one..??
A man ordered for a voice automated robot
car that does anything he tells it to do
correctly without any error.
He got the car and started sending it on
errands. He became very proud of what the
car could do without mistakes.
One day, he was home and his wife told him
to tell the car to go and pick the children
from school as she was very tired.
The man agreed and said to the car…
Car, go and bring my children from school.
The car went and didn’t return in time as
expected, they knew something must be
wrong.
Several hours later and no car, the man
became apprehensive.
He dressed up and got ready to lodge a
report at the police station.
As he and his wife stepped outside they saw
the car coming with an overload of children.
The car parked right in front of them and
said… “These are your children sir..!”
In the car were their Landlady’s two
daughters, his wife’s best friend’s daughter,
his secretary’s son and their neighbours
two sons.
The Wife in full anger…
Don’t tell me all these are your children..??
The man asked her calmly…
First you tell me why our children are not in
the car..??

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Find someone who knows that youre not perfect,
but treats you as if you are.

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I remember my father once caught me
watching etv Porn back in 2007 and
I pretended to be asleep.
My family tried to wake me up for 3days

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A man had four sons from different mothers☺
Brodwel,Kenneth,Conrad & Dominic
Now these guys asked their father why he
gave em those names,n what do they mean😐?

The father replied:
Take the first three letters of your names and
join em together you will find the answer

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My most brilliant achievement was my ability
to be able to persuade my wife to marry me.

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That awkward moment when u are talking to a very handsome dude at a funeral then ur mom comes and say to u
“pour that samp in a plastic that’s dinner

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I am starting to think that alcohol percentage
of the Russian Bear it is just there to fool us…
That thing issa 101% alcohol…

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“Sometimes in life, we need a few bad days
in order to keep the good ones in perspective.”
— Colleen Hoover

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If people could see the face i make,
when i read their fb status update,
they would probably unfriend me .. ‘

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That moment when u buy your girlfriend a hair dryer😍..
and all of the sudden you see her
cooling down the porridge with it😒

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When someone is in a bad mood,
look them in the eyes and
tell them to smile.
They will always smile and
cheer up a bit.
Good Morning.

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1.Wife : “why r u home so early?”�

Hubby :
“My boss said go to hell!”

2.Doctor : Howz ur headache ?
Patient : she’s out of town

3. Marriage is like a public toilet . Those waiting outside are desperate to get in & Those inside are desperate to come out.

4.No Man Can Ever Be Satisfied with 4 things in life:
(1) Mobile
(2) Automobile
(3) TV
(4) Wife
Because, there is always a better model in neighborhood

5.Compromising does not mean you are wrong and your wife is right.

It only means that the safety of your head is much more important than your ego!

6.Whisky is a brilliant invention. One double and you start feeling single again.

7.It is said that when a woman closes her eyes, she sees the person she love the most and when a man does that.
The slide show begins.

8.Funny quote on a husband`s T-Shirt:
All girls are devils, but my wife is the queen of them.

9.Q- You know why women love shoes?
A- Because no matter how much & whatever they eat , the shoes always fit..

10. Q- Why can’t Women Drive well?
A- Because there are so many mirrors in a car to distract them..

11.Q- Why can’t Women stand a day in a Jungle?
A- There are no Shopping Centers..

12.Q- How to save a Dying Woman?
A- Tell her about a 90% Sale going on somewhere..

13.Q- If a Woman is Quiet, which day is it?
A- Who Cares, just Enjoy that Day..

14.The woman who invented the phrase “All men
are the same” was a Chinese woman who lost
her husband in a crowd.

15.There are 3 kinds of men in this
world.
Some remain single and make
wonders happen. Some have
girlfriends and see wonders happen.
Rest get married and wonder what
happened=))�

16.Wives are
magicians. ….. . . . . . . . . . . They
can change anything into an
argument

17.Women live a Better, Longer &
Peaceful Life, as compared to men.
WHY? A very INTELLIGENT man
replied: Women don’t have a wife!
True or false?

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You deserve someone who
makes you fall asleep smiling,
not someone who makes it
hard for you to sleep at night
because you’re crying.

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A wife to her husband: “Honey, what are you doing?”
“Im reading our marriage certificate.”
“What for?”
“Im looking for the expiry date…

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Stop saying that another man’s food is another man’s poison. …….
can u please take your poison in peace. ..

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