I just called my girlfriend and
I’m hearing a naked man’s voice.
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A grandson goes to visit his grandmother
she’s in the kitchen and says make yourself at home
on the coffee table a big bowl of nuts he helps himself
she walks in he says these nuts are good grandma
she says all I can do is suck the chocolate off without my teeth in lol
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If your girlfriend has friends she calls, boo, bish,bestie,galfriend
my broda that is the board of directors that ruins your relationship
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The simplest way to stay happy is to
let go of everything that makes you sad
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That awkward moment when you really want to eat and
then there’s this visitor who is not showing a sign of leaving
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Imagine The Government Passing A New Law That All Beautiful Ladies And Handsome Guys Gonna Pay “Beauty Tax” I Know You’re Smiling Coz You’re Safe🙆🚶
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Question: “What Is The Hardest Job In The World?”
Answer: “Sketching For Police Officers In China“
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You can’t change what has already happened,
So don’t waste your time
thinking about it.
Move on, Let Go, And Get Over It. “
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Your importance in a black family is when
you bring in money. Expect the worst
when you’re unemployed.
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You can’t change what’s happened in your past,
so before you let it destroy your future; learn to live with it
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Sometimes I Want to Die For A Day” Go To Heaven See What’s Going On That Side and Come Back Just to Watch and See who Really cared!!
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After 10 years, the wife starts to think their kid looks kinda strange so she decides to do a DNA test.
She finds out that the kid is actually from completely different parents.
Wife: Honey, I have something very serious to tell you
Husband: What’s up?
Wife: According to DNA test results, this is not our kid
Husband: Well you don’t remember, do you??
When we were leaving the hospital, we noticed that our baby had pooped.
Then you said:
– Please go change the baby, I’ll wait for you here.
So I went inside, got a clean one and left the dirty one there.
Moral: Never give a man a job that doesn’t belong to him.
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Stay away from people who suddenly text you after you’ve uploaded a new picture, they are very dangerous.
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In A bus Today
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Conductor: Nice dress
☆
Lady: Thanks!
☆
Conductor: Nice earrings
☆
Lady: Thanks
☆
Conductor: Nice Lipstick
☆
Lady: wooow thanks
☆
Conductor: But still you are not looking beautiful
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Doctor to patient: How did you hurt yourself so badly?
Patient: I simply asked my wife, “where have you been?”
She replied: “To the beauty parlour”,
I just asked:”Was it closed?”
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Met my crush at mukuleng i bought doritos with money
i was suppose to buy cabbage with
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