I am not perfect but at least i don’t call pastors and their wives mommy and daddy..!
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Break up with me but in a few hours later I’ll be in a five months relationship
with another woman, no stress
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If alcohol slows down the progress of the youth,
can sober people please show us their millions..! ☝
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What’s the use of wearing G-string
if you have a flat ass…i mean
What are you dividing?
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I’ll never ask you to change for me because you are perfect just the way you are.
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Guy: Doctor, My girlfriend is pregnant but we always used double protection. Then, how is it possible?
Doctor: Let me tell you a story to make you realize that it is possible.
“There was a Hunter who always carried a Gun wherever he went. One day, he took his Umbrella instead of his
Gun and went out.
A Lion suddenly jumped infront of him. In order to scare the Lion, the hunter used the Umbrella like a Gun and shot the Lion, the Lion collapsed & died.
Guy:This is totally Nonsense. “Someone else must have shot the Lion”
Doctor: Good!!
Next patient please…have a lovely day
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Sometimes you don’t need a goal in life,
you don’t need to know the big picture.
you just need to know what you’re going to do next!
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Aden: bro can u swim?
Wasam : NO!
Aden : Dog is better than u because a dog can swim.
Wasam : ok can u swim?
Aden yes!
Wasam : So what’s the difference between I and a dog…
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A monkey is sitting in a tree, smoking a joint, when a lizard walks past. The lizard looks up and says “Hey! what are you doing?” The monkey says “Smoking a joint, come up and join me”
So the lizard climbs up and sits next to the monkey and they have another joint. After a while the lizard says his mouth is ‘dry’, and that he’s going to get a drink from the river.
At the riverbank, the lizard is so stoned that he leans too far over and falls in. A Crocodile sees this and swims over to the stoned lizard, helping him to the side.
He then asks the lizard, “What’s the matter with you?!” The lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting in the tree, smoking a joint with the monkey and his mouth got dry, and that he was so wasted that, when he went to get a drink from the river, he fell in!
The inquisitive crocodile says he has to check this out. He walks into the jungle and finds the tree where the monkey is sitting, finishing a joint.
He looks up and says “Hey, MONKEY!”
The Monkey looks down and says “FUUUUUCK, DUDE……. How much water did you drink ?
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People Who Knows Car Parts Let Us Confuse Them
Me : Front Sit.
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Not every friend request is a friend request…
some are surveillance cameras
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Did you know that you can talk about being a proud young mom without mentioning those that terminated their pregnancy.❤
~•~
Talk about being educated without mentioning those that dropped out.
Let’s try this, let’s not shine through others.💯
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Drinking garri doesn’t make you poor
but allowing swallow is poverty
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Some of you ladies your boyfriends are out there telling their sidechick
that they won’t break-up with you cz you might kill yourselves
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That Feeling , When You Enter The Exam Hall Late And
Your Friends Have Already Sat in Formation Without You
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Mince meat and Wors are the same.
The difference is that condom…
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