Being ugly doesn’t mean you should
remain indoors. Move out you might be
featured in a horror movie

SCHOOL RULES WHEN I AM A PRINCIPAL!!!
.
.1..female students should wear mini-skirts only
.
.2..lunch time takes 3hrs while each lesson takes
only 20 mins..
.
.3..If u wanna get high there’s a room for
smokers
.
.4..Wednesdays nd fridays its party time no
lessons..
.
.5..if u ar a quiet person “sorry!get the out
of my school..
.
.6..During examinations all students will be
provided with text books
.
.7..All students are free to bring their laptops nd
phones bcoz free Wi-Fi will be provided.
.
.8..If u insult a teacher ur punishment is to play
FIFA with the principal..
.
.9..At lunchtime students eat every kind of foods u want the school will provide…
.
. WILL YOU JOIN MY SCHOOL??

During Lunch at work last week, I ate 3 plates of beans (which I know I shouldn’t). When I got home, My husband seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly, “Daring I have a surprise for dinner tonight”He blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table.i took a sit and just as he was about to remove my blindfold , the telephone rang .

He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call. The beans I had consumed were effecting me and the pressure was becoming unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go .

It was not only loud , but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a garbage dump !! I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously, then , shifting to the other leg I ripped off three more

The stink was worse then Cooked cabbage, keeping my ears careful tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on releasing atomic bombs like this for another few minutes

The pleasure was indescribable eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, so I can quickly fanned the air a few more times with napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it Feeling very relieved and pleased with myself. My Face must have been the picture of innocent. When my husband returned, apologizing for taking so long, he asked me if had peaked through the blindfold and I assured him I had not

At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table with their noses, chorused, ” Happy Birthday”.

WITCHCRAFT is when your father sells his only piece of land and sent you abroad to study medicine, After 7 years you come back as a DJ.

Why do women think it’s ok to get home after a long day, greet a man then take off the wig like it’s nothing?
So, this wig is meant for the people on the streets
while your man sees another man at home??

A girl who is always online is a girl who’s always indoors🙈 ,she acts bitchy on Facebook but in reality ba loyal,Thats a girl who has no friends but hated by many people😢 and only dates 1 guy, a girl who does not party every weekend🍻🍺 but drinks on special occasions….Big up 2 u ladies

A jealous husband hired a private detective to check on his wife’s movements. The husband demanded more than just a written report – he wanted a video of his wife’s activities. A week later, the detective returned with a tape and sat down to watch it with the husband. As the tape played, he saw his wife meeting another man. He saw the two of them laughing in the park. He saw them enjoying themselves at an outdoor cafe. He saw them having a playful fight in the street. He saw them dancing in a dimly lit nightclub. When the tape ended, the distraught husband said: “I can’t believe this !” “What’s not to believe?” asked the detective. “It’s right up there on the screen. The camera never lies.” The husband replied: “What I mean is,
I can’t believe my wife is so much fun!”