Your mother bore you For 9 months ,
She watched her feet Swell, she struggled to Climb stairs,
She got breathless quick, She bore excruciating pain,
She suffered many sleepless Nights,
She became your nurse, your Chef, your teacher, your Cleaner, your launderette your Friend.
She struggled for you, but not Did she see it as a struggle,
Not once did she develop Regrets after all this …
How dare you say even “uff” to her …
I love my mother beyond limits
Do you … ? ? ?
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-If you need me and there are one thousand steps between us.
Just take one step and I’ll take nine hundred ninety- nine to be with you.
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A pastor was praying 4 a man possessed
with a demon.
He says”in the name of jesus
what do you want from dis man? ,speak
up before i cast you out dis moment!.
De demon answers,
“i want him to win de lotto draw worth
200bilion to night.
The pastor lowers de micro4nu an
whispers,” in jesus name, get
out of him and enter into me”
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To realize
The value of a sister/brother
Ask someone
Who doesn’t have one.
To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.
To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.
To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.
To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a stillborn.
To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother
Who has given birth to
A premature baby.
To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.
To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.
To realize
The value of one second:
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident.
Time waits for no one.
Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
You can share it with someone special.
To realize the value of a friend or family member:
LOSE ONE.
The origin of this letter is unknown,
But it brings introspection to everyone who reads it, you may want to share it with others. Its not copyright protected
Hold on tight to the ones you love!
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Think before you speak. Show, don’t say.
Prove things to yourself, not others.
Live to be happy, not to please others..! 
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When I’m Drunk
I Become Very Alert
… Before Crossing The Road I Look Left
And Right 
For Cars
And Bikes
And Then Look Up
For Aeroplanes
And Down For Bombs
Then Look Back For Kidnappers
After That I Hold My Beer And Walk Zig Zag
To Avoid Bullets
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Getting offended by something posted on social media
is like choosing to step in dog shit
instead of walking
around it..!
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Technology Sucks 
A Wife Doing Her Make Up Early Morning Straight Out From Bed!!
Husband: Are You Crazy !?
Wife : Just Shut Up, I Need To Unlock My Phone. its On Face Recognition Feature And It Is Not Recognizing Me …!!!
Husband: 
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priest: do u take this girl to be ur wife?
boy: ya
priest: do u take this boy to be ur husband
girl: only as a friend..
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Today was my first time smoking weed!
I saw 2 guys wearing matching outfits……
I asked them if they’re gay, and they Arrested me
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Wife Is Dreaming. Wakes Up And Shouts
“Quick My Husband’s Back!”
His Husband Wakes Up And
Jumps Out The Window!
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What baffles me the most in church
is seeing ladies
fainting letf,
right & centre but still remember to close their legs
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Imagine dating a broke man but his family think
you’re with him for the money..
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No matter how full my wardrobe is,
I never seem to find anything to wear.
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I found my late uncle’s SIM card on the drawer 
now I’m thinking of whatsapping his girlfriends and be like:
.
“Hey baby, I’m back”
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When a white man creates a smartphone with video call, it is technology, but when your grandmother from a village uses a mirror to see you when you are in Gauteng its witchcraft…
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