decided to burn lots of calories
today so I set a fat kid on fire..

Nobody is hating on you, people are busy, we are busy,
you should get busy too and stop having imaginary haters.

Family WhatsApp groups are boring, lazy and dead. Wait until one mess up and see how everyone will be active in seconds⏰
Even your late Aunty who died 7 years ago will be commenting on her blackberry from her grave

To avoid condom related accidents, use 2 condoms with chilli powder in between them.

If the outer one breaks, she will know; and if the inner one breaks, you will know!

– Wisdom will kill me

I’m done blocking all the beautiful women
If you see this you know what it’s means

When they can’t afford Makeup Anymore they Upload a Pic
with the Caption *My sick face*
Girls why giving yourselves Pressure..

There is a truck driver who whenever he sees a Politician walking down the street, he always swerves to hit him. One day he sees a priest on the side of the road looking for a ride and so the truck driver picks him up. While they were driving, the driver sees a Politician , and swerves to hit him. But then he remembered he had a priest in the truck, so he swerved back on the road, but he heard a loud “thump” anyway. So the driver turns to the priest and says “Please forgive me,” and the priest said, “You didn’t hit the Politician , but that’s OK, I got him with the door.”