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In life you are either a passenger or a pilot,
it’s your choice

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She posted ::my bae is 40 so what?
.
I commented : you spelled dad incorrect
.
I wonder why she blocked me

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*Ladies, If you play your man like a football,
another woman will catch him like a goalkeeper,
you will regret watching the highlights*

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A grade 2 kid was coming from school he entered the taxi and he started singing “if my father was a King my mother will be a Queen and I’ll be a Prince”
The taxi driver silenced the kid but the kid continued “if my father was the President my mother will be the First Lady and I’ll be the First Son”
then with anger the taxi driver asked the kid “what if your father was a robber what will your mother be and what will you be”
and the boy said “if my father was a robber my mother will be a prostitute and I’ll be a taxi driver!!!!!!?

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When they see you happy with your partner,
they start telling them about what you did in 1996🤐🤐🤐

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I don’t know why drunk people love to speak
near other people’s faces.

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A man escapes from a prison where he had been kept for 15 years. As he runs away, he finds a house and breaks into it, looking for money and guns, but only finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him up in a chair. While tying the girl up to the bed, he gets on top of her, kisses her on the neck, then gets up, and goes to the bathroom.

While he’s in there, the husband tells his wife, “Listen, this guy is an escaped prisoner, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail, and hasn’t seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don’t resist, don’t complain, just do what he tells you, just give him satisfaction. This guy must be dangerous, if he gets angry, he’ll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you.”, to which the wife responds, “He was not kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked if we kept any Vaseline in the bathroom. Be strong, honey, I love you, too.”

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Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo,
but what you want is someone
who will take the bus with you
when the limo breaks down.

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It’s amusing when you pull all of your efforts,
to help someone.
But when you need help,
they don’t even take a glance at you.

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Stop posting your problems on facebook and
start drinking alcohol just like the rest of us🙌

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*A DIVORCED SINGLE MOTHER WROTE*_
I am writing to you in order to make someone understand that it’s good to appreciate our partners despite their flaws.
I am 32 years of age.
My ex husband and I dated for 6 years.
We where best of friends.
I waited until he completed college and started work.
My family and his family then met.
We got married and had a son. (7 years old now).
My husband was short tempered at times but our problems started when I wanted to make him feel he couldn’t control me.
Every time we argued, I would pack my bags, go to my family and explain.
My sisters would phone my husband and shout at him.
If he was controlling me I would always dare him that if he wished, he could divorce me.
I never wanted divorce.
I just had pride and I never wanted to look like a loose woman in his eyes.
One day I pushed him so hard that for the first time he beat me and locked me outside.
I went to my family, my family took him to the police, every time I looked like I was being abused!
But to be honest, I used to abuse my husband emotionally.
He was arrested and detained.
I was asked by his family to withdraw the case.
I felt that what I was doing was wrong.
My husband was never a violent man, he did what he did because I pushed him to the wall of which he openly knelt down and apologized.
I withdrew the charge, and we reconciled.
After three months, I packed my bags after a small issue and he remained alone.
After two days, I
received a call that he was in the hospital.
My family told me that I shouldn’t go there because it would look like I was begging him and my sisters believed he was feigning the illness.
All this time, people felt sorry for me like I was the one being abused.
He spent a week in the hospital, after he came out, I just received a divorce summon.
I wanted to say no to divorce, but because I felt this pride, I wanted him to change his mind and beg me.
I called him and said he would get the divorce because I lived like I was in hell.
When we went to court, I wanted to make him pay, so I told the court that I needed his properties to be shared.
To my surprise he openly told the court that whatever he and I acquired together should be given to me, all he wanted was divorce.
We were divorced in 2009 July.
Now, my husband is married, whilst l am here wasted!
My family members are gossiping about me.
I depend on what my ex husband gives to my son for survival.
I know I wasted my
marriage.
I am here telling all wives that they should be careful how they get advise.
Don’t be cheated, don’t entertain family interference in your marriage my dear reader.
Even my young sisters are much more respected than me.
Those who encouraged me to get divorced are always teasing and bad mouthing me.
Please ladies, be vigilant in your marriage.
Thought it wise to share my story to save your marriage.
There is no benefit in pride for nothing.
*SOMETIMES IT’S NOT THE MAN’S FAULT AT ALL, IT’S YOUR PRIDE,AND THE PEOPLE YOU ALLOWED TO ADVISE YOU,SO BE WISE AND VIGILANT IN YOUR MARRIAGE*

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Imagine deleting all the pictures you took with your ex
Boom!! He/She becomes a celebrity
No evidence to show us you once dated.

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Been single for too long,
I don’t even remember how to spell rilationsheep.

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Make the impossible possible ,and always belief
what god can do for in fixture.

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IT guys are weak,they can’t even hack the Calender
and delete 14 February😏

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