Nothing is as painful than being phoned
by your crush telling you to check your wall
& respond but you can’t tell her you’re on
free mode
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If a girl is talking to your man she is not the problem, he is. The fact that other girls feel so welcomed reflects on how your man acts behind your back.
You can’t get mad at another female for not staying in her lane if your man hasn’t defined a lane for her to stay..!!
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*STUDENT OBTAINED 0% IN AN EXAM!*
I WOULD HAVE GIVEN HIM 100%! EACH ANSWER IS ABSOLUTELY GRAMMATICALLY CORRECT AND FUNNY TOO. THE TEACHER HAS NO SENSE OF HUMOR.
*Q1: IN WHICH BATTLE DID NAPOLEON DIE?*
“`HIS LAST BATTLE.“`
*Q2: WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE SIGNED?*
“`AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE.“`
*Q3: RIVER RAVI FLOWS IN WHICH STATE?*
“`LIQUID.“`
*Q4: WHAT IS THE MAIN REASON FOR DIVORCE?*
“`MARRIAGE.“`
*Q5: WHAT IS THE MAIN REASON FOR FAILURE?*
“`EXAMS.“`
*Q6: WHAT CAN YOU NEVER EAT FOR BREAKFAST?*
“`LUNCH & DINNER.“`
*Q7: WHAT LOOKS LIKE HALF AN APPLE?*
“`THE OTHER HALF.“`
*Q8: IF YOU THROW A RED STONE INTO THE BLUE SEA WHAT WILL IT BECOME?*
“`WET.“`
*Q9: HOW CAN A MAN GO EIGHT DAYS WITHOUT SLEEPING?*
“`NO PROBLEM, HE SLEEPS AT NIGHT.“`
*Q10: HOW CAN YOU LIFT AN ELEPHANT WITH ONE HAND?*
“`YOU WILL NEVER FIND AN ELEPHANT THAT HAS ONE HAND“`
*Q11: IF YOU HAD THREE APPLES AND FOUR ORANGES IN ONE HAND AND FOUR APPLES AND THREE ORANGES IN OTHER HAND, WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE?*
“`VERY LARGE HANDS“`
*Q12: IF IT TOOK EIGHT MEN TEN HOURS TO BUILD A WALL, HOW LONG WOULD IT TAKE FOUR MEN TO BUILD IT?*
“`NO TIME AT ALL, THE WALL IS ALREADY BUILT“`
*Q13: HOW CAN YOU DROP A RAW EGG ONTO A CONCRETE FLOOR WITHOUT CRACKING IT?*
“`ANY WAY YOU WANT, CONCRETE FLOORS ARE VERY HARD TO CRACK.“`
*Spread some laughter, share the cheer. Let’s be happy, while we’re here!
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If you think women are not loyal then think again ,
I believe your mother was loyal to your dad
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Dear Crush:
You are sending mixed messages when u say:
“I love u with all my Hut”
Please get it right
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Yo mama so fat…
when she farted she caused global warming
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When you are bored just think about a few things that don’t make sense …like ;
1. If poison expires, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?
2. Which letter is silent in the word “Scent,” the S or the C?
3. Do twins ever realize that one of them is unplanned?
4. Why is the letter W, in English, called double U? Shouldn’t it be called double V?
5. Maybe oxygen is slowly killing you and It just takes 75-100 years to fully work.
6. Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty.
7. The word “swims” upside-down is still “swims”
8. 100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.
9. If you replace “W” with “T” in “What, Where and When”, you get the answer to each of them.
Wisdom will kill me one of these days.
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Dating a broke married man is a waste of sin my sister
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You should be a light for other people. Live so that they will see the good things you do and will praise your father in heaven. Matt. 5:16
You want to make a difference in your world? Live a holy life
Be faithful to your spouse.
Be the one at the office who refuses to cheat.
Be the neighbor who acts neighborly.
Be the employee who does the work and does’nt complain.
Pay your bills.
Do your part and enjoy life.
Don’t speak one message and live another.
People are watching the way we act more than they are listening to what we say. Have a lovely day bo babe You know exactly that am crazy about you
.
May our Heavenly Father help you to fulfill your dreams
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12 Rules of Street Football
When We Were Kids…
1. The fat kid was always the goalkeeper
2. The owner of the ball decides who plays.
3. Penalties were awarded only if injured player curses a lot.
4. The match only ends when everyone is tired
.
5. No matter how many goals you score, the winner will be determined by the last team to score.
6. No referees and linesmen. You could run with the ball even behind the goal post.
7. If you don’t participate in repairing the ball, you will be given a match ban.
8. If you’re picked last, you’re a loser.
9. The guy who’s never picked was to fetch the ball from the tree when it got stuck, under the car or in another person’s compound to play in the next game
.
10. When the owner of the ball gets annoyed, game over!
11. You were allowed to change a goalkeeper in case of a penalty.
12. The most skillful player get an automatic selection.True or false?
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Bright Future Can Give You Many Beautiful Girls.
But A Beautiful Girl Cannot Give You A Bright Future.
From Boy’s Welfare Association.
So Boys Waken And Shine The Future.
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I think I have anger issues… Anytime someone annoys me,
I tend to give him some money cause I’m angry..
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Imagine dating a nyaope guy and you get a text saying,
“babe I’m at the gate are you going to come out or
should I leave with it?”
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Then She Said “l Need A Shoulder To Crayon”
I Asked Her Which Colour And She Blocked Me
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No horror movie can give you the feeling you get
when you tap your pockets and don’t feel your phone”
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A Mother -in -Law decides to test her three Son- in- laws for their good nature.
For this she goes for a walk by a river with the first son in law & jumps in. He saves her. Next morning he finds a Toyota corolla parked outside his house with note: From your Mother In Law.
Next she goes for a walk by the river with the second son in law & jumps in. He too saves her. Next morning he also finds a Toyota Corolla parked outside his house with note : From your Mother In Law.
Next she goes for a walk by a river with the third son in law & jumps in. He just laughs and walks away. Next morning he finds a BMW M5 parked outside his house with note:
from your Father In Law!
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