Most gals don’t wanna be in a relationship these days,
they just want to be in the front seat of a Car,
Seatbelt on and Take selfies

Rich who was happy that his wife had given birth ran to the hospital….🏃🏃🏃

Doctor: “congratulations sir! Your wife has given birth to Triplet”😊

Rich: “Thanks Doctor but why did you and
my wife name the baby without my consent?

A Preacher said: “If I had all the beer in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river”. And the congregation cried,”Amen!” “And if I had all the wine in the world, I’d take it and throw it in the river”. And the congregation cried,”Amen!” “And if I had all the whiskey and rum in the world, I’d take it all and throw it in the river”. Again the congregation cried,”Amen!”
The preacher sat down. The deacon then stood up & said: “For our closing hymn, let’s turn to page 126 of our hymn books and sing, ‘We shall drink from that river’.
THE CONGREGATION SCREAMED HALLELUJAH!!

Her: Hey sugar
Me: hello teabag
She blocked me😱
I thought we were making tea

Being hurt by someone you love can make you wake up at 2am and
say “Yah neh!” and go back to sleep

I tried all my best to convince this girl on facebook to visit me but she always told me that she was very busy. Her profile pictures were always tempting me and everything she did on social media was very good to me that i decided to take it to another level at my own experience …Hope you know what i mean. So at last i managed to take her number and i called her immediately to confirm if it was really her. We talked for a long time and later i discovered that she was living not far from my place. I then said to myself, “this is my opportunity which i have never had and never shall i have in future”. She promised me that she will visit me the following week Thursday. But that Thursday was too far to me. Thursday finally came, i called her around 7:30 just to confirm if she was indeed coming to my place. After she had confirmed that she was coming, i started putting everything inorder.I bought expensive perfumes, expensive food and 8 condoms. Around 9pm she knocked on my door. She was looking sooo sexy . . . I was more than happy after i saw how she was looking and ……….. My dear brothers and Sisters, see how you are serious reading this story. . ……. . I wish you can learn how to read your Bible like this….. . I bet ,God will like it and be happy other than reading a lot of stories which won’t help you. If it were a biblical message, you’d have stopped immediately. God bless you

Atleast Mosquitoes sing for us before they eat us,
unlike some idiots.

Hello Ladies and Gentleman.
My name is Nyaa

I am a 30 year old
handsome,
hardworking,
GOD fearing young man,
a commited and successful
community psychology masters student,
and looking for a
cute,
hairy👌,
beautiful👌,
well structured
and young black goat
to buy for easter.

Thanks🙄

BREAKING NEWS
Beer bottles and cigarrete packs have
stickers explaining their harzadous
effects….but they let women just roam
around without stickers…
very unfair

Are you aware that when the relationship is still new
there’s no Network problem..!!?

Hey guys,

Please be informed that somebody is trying to spread a dangerous rumour that I have stopped DRINKING alcohol.

I therefore categorically state here that at no point did I ever attempt to stop. In fact, I have never contemplated or dreamt about it.

These are lies fabricated by my enemies who want to tarnish my good reputation by preventing my family and friends like you from offering me beers during this festive period.

I beg of you all to stay calm and vigilant while I investigate this BLACKMAIL.

I will keep you all updated

Some guys are HIV negative because they’re broke 😏
you should thank God for your brokenness is a blessing in a way

TIP:
“Never treat your current partner based on what your last partner did”

“No Woman Can Control Me, No Woman Can Control Me”; “No woman can tell me what to do”
~•~^~•~
But Once She Says: “Go Lock the Door First” You Fly Like A Bird..!

I’ve just killed a mosquito that bitten Me 5 years Ago 😬
.
That N*gga thought I forgot his face