Imagine having sex with Lucy from Generations…..
She will be like…
“Eh wena saan ungazong hlanyisa yezwa,faka daidang daar….
jah show case bafanas ingenile!

After drinking a Wine Jesus stood up an
said ” one of you will betray me ”
Judas replied “unjalo-ke wena
musudakiwe uyadelela ,ku worse futh
makuthenge wena”

Ungene ngeVosho kwi-Relationship yabantu kant
Baydlela iTreatment uphume usunyonyoba nge Walk yePhara

It’s painful being a side chick
Side chick : Hi baby
Guy : Sho chief zkhiphani ?
Side chick : just called to say I love you .
Guy : Sho commander nawe uyazi sisonke
Side chick : ok Good night baby
Guy : Viva comrade

KUKHONA INTO ONGEKE UYICHAZE!!!!
IFarmer(umnikazi wePulazi) ihleli eTavern
etafuleni ibukeka iStressed iphuza ubeer ibambe
ikhanda, kuqhamuke uThisha neyakhe
ibeer ahlale kuleli tafula okuhleli kulo
iFarmer,abuze uthisha” haw nsizwa yakithi
wabukeka uneStress,Kwenzenjani?
Iphendule iFarmer”ey nsizwa yakithi kukhona
into ongeke uychaze”,
abuze futhi uthisha “haw kwenzenjani?”,
iphendule ifarmer”bengisenga inkomo
ubisi,luthe seligcwele ibhakede,yalikhahlela
ibhakede ngonyawo lakwaLeft,lwachitheka ubisi”,
aphendule uthisha”haw yin ewrong lapho?
ngoba phela uma ilithichile usenga olunye”,
iphendule ifarmer”ey nsizwa yakithi kukhona
into ongeke uychaze ndoda!,
ngidonse inkomo
ngaybeka esangweni lesibaya ngase ngabopha
umlenze wakwaLeft ogodweni olukwaLeft
ngafaka ugodo lokbopha ikhanda phambili
nyana nesango phakathi esibayeni,ngasenga
futhi,luthe selugcwele yalukhahlela futhi
ngonyawo lakwaRight This time, ngase
ngabopha unyawo lakwaRight ogodwen
lakwaRight yavuleka imilenze yenkomo”,
uthisha athi”qhubeka kwase kwenzakalani? Im
sure kusengeke kahle”.
Iqhubeke ifarmer ichaze ithi”ewu nsizwa
yakithi kunento ongeke uychaze!
ngisengile futhi,luthe seluzogcwala ubisi,inkomo
yalushaya ngomsila lwachitheka lonke ubisi”,
UThisha athi”hawuu,wenze njani ke mayenza
nje,im Sure ubophele umsila emzimbeni wayo
inkomo?”,
iqhubeke ichaze ifarmer ithi”ewu nsizwa
yakithi kunento ongeke uychaze!, IMPELA
ngiwbophile umsila ibhakede belisawile
kanjalo,,,,inkinga nje ukuthi bese ziphelile
izintambo zokubopha so ngibe sengikhipha
ibhande lebhulukwe lami ngabopha umsila
emzimbeni,lapho ibhulukwe liwile
phansi…iUnder angiyfaki…lithe lisawe kanjalo
ibhulukwe kwaqhamuka uNkosikazi wami”,
ababaze uthisha”hawu utheni yena?”,
iphendule ifarmer “ewuu nsizwa yakithi
kukhona into ongeke uychaze…..

UThembi usebenza emakhishini kodwa uqala ukungasayiboni kahle indoda yakhe ngesikhwele, engu Romeo. Afone ngefoni yemsebenzini.
Ngriii,
Romeo ‘halo’
thembi ‘ukup love’?
Romeo ‘ngsendlini’
thembi ‘akushaye ikomishi ngespunu ngizwe’
Romzz ‘nqi nqi nqi’
thembi ‘thanx baba ngyakthanda’
kuqhubeke ehlala efona kusenzeka kanje.
Ngelinye ilanga uThembi aphume early emsebenzini afike endlini athole u Eric,umntanabo edlala yedwa endlini.
‘hawu Tinky,uyep ubabakho?’
Eric ‘angimazi mama kodwa uhambe nespunu nekomishi

kwati ngelinye ilanga ngizishukela ugwayi oluhlaza ngezwa sekuma iveni yamaphoyisa esangweni,ngsheshe ngiyishutheke kwi bhayibheli, angene aqonde endlini yami ngoba nomnyango wawuvulekile
Phoyisa : ndoda singamthola umfowenu?
Gumede : Cha akekho SGT
Phoyisa : (lithathe ibhayibheli)sicela ukukushiya ne vesi umfundele mayefika” *,kuvele insangu *
Phoyisa : yini le ?”
Gumz : akusiyo nje I underwear ka Adam ngoba wayegqok’ amahlamvu nje

Jabu: hey baby I’m coming 2day
Sli : I’m on my periods just incase
Jabu: I’m sori love I’m not coming
imoto yami seyiphumelwe isondo
Sli: Wothi umngan wakho
akak’lethe
Jabu: udutshulwe izolo
usesbhedlela
Sli : k angbonanga kahle angikho
kuma periods
Jabu: nangu umngan wam
engfonela uthi phume izolo
esbhedlela
Sli: weh naku ngi ngena kuma
periods
Jabu: oh Jesu naku umngan wam
bephinda bemdubula..

Yesterday I was at the mall, when I went to a public toilet. Immediately when I sat down. i had this conversation with an unknown
man
Man: hello
Me: yebo
Man: what are you doing there
Me: same thing you are doing there I guess
Man : baby I’m too horny ngingeza ngalapho
Me: (surprised ) Bhuti asazani mina nawe so please singaphaphelani
Man: okay baby, oh before I forget ngizokupha le R2200
Me : ( thinking “but R2200 for one round is a lot of money”) okay ke bhudi
Man : thank honey
Me:(by that time besengicabange lentsha tsha icavella) yiza Phela, but you must give me the money first
Man : baby I have to call you later there’s some idiot who answer all my question when I’m talking to you

Do your parents know kuthi mayilele
uyi’vusa ngomlomo? Ba busy bak’biza ngo
Mbali kanti uMavusana.

Lerato : e tsene ?
me : Yes love!
Lerato : Ok, Aah!, Aaah!, aaah!
Me:I’m kidding I’m still putting a condom

It’s painful being a side chick
Side chick : Hi baby
Guy : Sho chief zkhiphani ?
Side chick : just called to say I
love you .
Guy : Sho commander nawe
uyazi sisonke
Side chick : ok Good night baby
Guy : Viva comrade

Abantu bayathanda ukubuza ibhasi libhaliwe
.
.
1. Akubuze ukuthi uyapheka yini abe ekubona ubonda imbiza,
wothi cha ngishintsha umntwana inabukeni.

2. Nificana ka Edgars akubuze ukuthi ubuzokwenzani,
wothi ubuzobheka amathayi emoto uzwe kuthiwa kune discount.

3. Afone phakathi nobusuku akubuze ukuthi ulele yini ,
othi no no no nginisela ingadi.

4. Akubuze ukuthi ugqokeni ebusuku,
wothi iRain coat.

5. Itax ibiza uR8 wena ukhiphe uR10 akubuze ukuthi nibangaki ,
wothi iback seat yonke.

6. Akufice etown kade ninaye erank akubuze ukuthi kanti nawe ubuza la, wothi cha empeleni ngiya ezulwini angazi ngfunani lana.

7. Ukufica eclubbini kodwa uzokbuza ukuthi uyaphila yini
wothi chaa ngibalekile emotshari ngiyabuyela

8. Ufake ijacket akubuze ukuthi uyagodola yini
wothi cha ngenzela ukundiza kahle.

9. Usemsebenzini akubuze ukuthi uyasebenza yini
wothi cha ngisheva intshebe

10. Uyadla akubuze ukuthi ulambile yini
w othi cha uyapakisha nje just incase.

11. Akufice eKFC udla akubuze uzodla inyama nawe la?
Wothi cha ngzogunda utshani.

12. Ufake ijoyini yesonto akubuze ukuthi kanti nawe uyasonta
wothi cha sigqoka kanje masiyogida iskokotsha

13. Ufake i uniform akubuze ukuthi kanti nawe uyafunda,
wothi cha ngiwuthisha

Boyze:Baba yini ikaka yenkomo ?
Baba: yibulongwe fanami.
Boyze: Baba yini eyenkukhu?
Baba: Yibudoriro mntanami !
Boyze: eyembuzi yona?
Baba: Zingqathayi fana wami.
Boyze: Ngubani uMongameli waseCongo ?
Baba: Yho hayi angimazi .
Boyze: Owase Germany yena ngubani?
Baba: Naye angimazi ngitsho nix nix .
Boyze: Kanti Baba ngabe kukhona okunye okwaziyo ngaphandle kothuvi ,ngoba ngathi uqhaphele ukunya nje kuphela

relationships nowadays

Boy : Baby are you coming at my place tonight or ngifonele uLinhle ?

Girl : call her baby , ngizolala kuSizwe uholile izolo

Ukukhumula isdudla akuhlukile nokutshintsha ibedding ku queen sized bed