Bumped to my Ex
.
Ex: Hey Rich wow waze wakhuluphala ayi shuthi izinto sezikuhambela kahle
–
Rich: Hahahaha wow nawe waze wancipha shuthi ngangikuphethe kahle
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Ex: Hahahaha namanje usabhedaYazi angikholwa ukuthi savele sahlukana kalula kanjalo sesithandane 7 years wonke
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Rich: Jah neh.Well ngisaphuthuma I hope sobuye sibonane
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Ex: Okay Rich ngaze ngajabula ukukubona Thatha nansi inamba yami.
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Rich: Okay Nansi ifoni ibhale
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Ex: Mmmmm nazo ke sengiyibhalile usungayi saver
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Rich: Eish isave wena
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Ex: Angikwazi uku saver ngale phone yakho
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Rich: Eish…okay konje igama ubani?
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Ex: Nxii uyinja Rich sathandana 7 years awusakhumbuli ngisho igama lami
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Rich: Okay Ngzothi 7 years k

Bafwethu SikwaNONGOMA nomjita wami Siqambe Amanga Sathi siDISTRUCTION BOYS Ngikhuluma nje sidla inyama mahhala,Uma ngiqeda ukuluma ngivele ngithi HAIIBOO! Bavele Bahlanye BaJaive Bonke

Lolz Love ths one
Joke by Nonhle Snothando Marawhy
.
Convo between senzo n cashier
Cashier: bhuti your card has been declined

Senzo:manje umemezela uban nezinywele kwangathi impepho

GAL : Bbe Ngcela Ungipha Imali Yekhanda
BOY : Ufuna Elengulube Noma Elenkomo Khona Ngizokuphathele Ksasa ETown Mase Ngothenga UBeer

When a girl has big boots

Americans : that girl has big ass

Swatis : awu uwutfwele mdzidzi lomntfwanyana

[01/24, 09:10] Dj Skinny: Eish ngaze ngamhalela locc umzimba wakhe ugcwele uboya yooh
[01/24, 09:12] Carter: Mostly abafana abakhula bezeka imbuzi yibo abagijimisa ubu hairy be ntombi ngoba bajwayela izivoko

dlalani kahle labanye

Kanti vele kwenzeka njani ukuthi umuntu ezivelela eZim esehlala eHillbrow umuzwe esesithi: “efletini lami”, uyabe eselithenge malini or eseliphiwe ngubani?

Teacher:What does HIV stands for?
Boy:Holiday in Victoria falls.
Teacher:(Angry)u kids are stupid last week lathi umntwana wemvu yimvana now u keep repeating your stupidity, and wena Fatso i asked you nicely ukuthi’what’s a baby lizzard called’and u said Lizzy.Cynthia lawe uyahĺeka.That day i asked you where fish come from and u said egabheni.l give up manje.Tsitsi akungiphendule, ilizwe elilungisa amakombi kuthwa kungaphi?
Tsitsi:tsikombi
Teacher:Simba make a sentence ele word ‘sugar’.
Simba:umama unatha itiye.
Teacher: manje ibala elithi ‘sugar’lingaphi khonapho?
Simba:liphakathi kwetiye

Ukudelela kwamaSmall House
Unamntwana:Ngicela ukukhuluma lomnikazi wefon
Small House:Usagqoka icondom izandla zakhe zigcwele amafutha

uSomatekisi ugibeza uGogo babebabili etaxin kukanti usomatekisi ufuna ukubhema manje unqena ngoba abanye abantu abazwani logwayi bese ebuza umfana “Gogo uyawusaba yini ugwayi? azithulele uGogo aphinde futhi “Gogo uyawusaba yini ugwayi?ambuke uGogo bese ebuza “nibangaki ngakini mzukulu”aphendule umfana sibangu2″athi uGogo “ngunyoko osaba ugwayi mina nginabantwana abangu9”

Nakhu uSipho uyaxoshwa emsebenzini bese ecabanga ukuvula ikhemesi nangempela ayivule aqashe abantu abawu2 ukuthi bamsize bese ebeka imithetho ukuthi “Mawulaphekile ukhokha uR1000 uma ungalaphekanga sikubuyisela uR5000 back” akubeke ngaphandle lokho njebhodi …. kuqhamuke iphoyisa lifunde langaphandle libone ukuthi iningi lemali angene ngaphakathi

PHOYISA: dokotela nginekinga yokungayizwa I taste yokudla engikudlayo

DR: basebenzi ngicela ibhodlela number 22 lapho .. phuza lana

PHOYISA : aphuze ( arghhh ) ungiphuzisa umchamo lona

DR: khokha ndoda sewukwazi ukuzwa I taste manjr uzwile ukuthi ngumchamo lo(likhokhe iphoyisa ..libone ukuthi libhayizile libuye futhi ngakusasa )
PHOYISA: dokotela nginenkinga yokungakhumbuli ebingikudla izolo ngisize (imambane le iyayifuna lemali)
DR: basebenzi lethani lelo bhodlela unumber 22.
PHOYISA: cha cha cha aii leli bhodlela layizolo lomchamo.
DR: khokha ngoba sewukhumbula ukuthi bewudlani izolo(likhokhe iphoyisa libone ukuthi libhayizile futhi phela lemali liyayifuna libuye futhi)
PHOYISA: dokotela nginekinga yokungaboni emehlweni
DR: cha ngeke sikwazi ukukusiza lapho bamba naku uR5000 wakho besho bemnika uR50
PHOYISA: hawu engani ngu R50 njr loo
DR: khokha ngoba usuyabona ukuthi malini lee ……..iphoyisa lavele laqaleka

Nywe nywe miss my boyfriend”
Manje thina senzen? Si react nga masende wakhe?

Husband: i heard our neighbour slept with every lady from our street except one..i wonder who it is?
Wife: it must be mamfundhisi from down the road…that lady is so stubborn

Dear Zulu People.
When You Say “Izolo” Are You Talking About Yesterday Or Weed?
You Are Comfusing Us!

After S** feedback from different Ladies.
.
– American lady: Thanks sweetheart, that was awesome
– UK lady: I’m so grateful honey, that was great
– India lady: Oh thank u very much, I love you
– Mzansi lady: So, o reng ka tshelete ya Moriri ????ngeke udle mahhala