“I’ll see you in court” is just the grown up version of
“I’m going to tell my mom

My Ex girlfriend just liked a page of a traditional healer (Bring back lost lovers and control them with a remote control)
Please pray for me…

Rules for my Girl
,
*Carry at least R100 whenever you come to
visit me
.
*Come with some food, you know I’m broke
.
*Steal your parents money and give it to me
.
*Whenever we make love you must thank
me with at least a pack of cigarettes
.
*I love a woman more if she buys me
cigarettes
.
*Please call me at least 5 times a day
.
*Send me a good morning, good day and
goodnight message everyday
.
*I don’t come to your place, you must
always come to my place
.
*You must let me fuck your friend, if you
don’t want me to cheat.
.
*We don’t go out, unless you willing to pay.
I’m broke mos.
.
*Don’t come when you on your
periods,unless you don’t mind me crossing
the robot.
.
*Buy me clothes please, at least after each
and every 3 months
.
*I hate women who eat more than me
.
*When I’m moody, kindly give me money or
good sex
.
*When I’m sad, kindly buy me a beer
.
*Read my mind, you need to study my mind,
you need to know when I’m hungry
.
*Lastly please buy me airtime, every Friday
,
Oh! And at least have a side nigga who’ll
give you money so that you can give it to
me.

I saved my Girl’s contact
with her real name on my
phone book but usually when i
pick her call i say “HI LOVE”….
.
So yesterday, i ran out of air time
while talking to her, so i had to
use my friend’s phone to call her
without he notice, when i dialed
her number on his phone, it
displayed “MY LOVE”. . . So i was
wondering how that
smartphone knew i was calling
her.
.
Samsung Smart phones are really smart shame!!!!

Every time you meet us, “it’s am asking for R2, am asking for a R5..”
These are ‘tollgate’ manners that’s why people avoid you..!

No one wears expensive clothes like a guy
who’s not taking care of his child

I made Vodacom people stupid today,
I bought R29 airtime n I threw it away without inserting it

I’m not alcoholic, I only drink twice a year…
When it’s my birthday, and when it’s not my birthday…

Nobody Views Your WhatsApp Status
Faster Than Your Ex