I’ve called the police using my Hurricane cellphone then boom!! There’s an ambulance in front of my gate. I wonder who seek medical attention
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I’ve called the police using my Hurricane cellphone then boom!! There’s an ambulance in front of my gate. I wonder who seek medical attention
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A Russian While Visiting India Went For An Eye Check Up. The Dr. Shows The Letters On The Board “CZWXNQSTAZKY” & Asked.
Doctor: “Can You Read This?”
Russian: “Read? I Even Know This Guy. He’s My Cousin.”
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Me:mom our kettle is not working we
should throw it at the dump site
Mom:why?
Me:because its useless
Mom:wena did we throw U away when U
were born?
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Need to stop texting when am drunk,
am back with 3 of my ex’s🙇
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ladies if your boyfriend/husband
is cheating on u…
boil water … Let it boil,boil and boil,boil boil…
While water is still boiling wait 4 him to fall asleep…….
Whn ur very sure dt he is sleeepin….
thn make some tea nd drink
Tea reduces stress
stop crying…!
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Banta Asked To Santa.
Banta: “When You Kiss Your Wife?”
Santa: “I Kiss My Wife Before I Go To Office Every Day And You?”
Banta: “I Kiss Your Wife After You Go To Office Everyday”
Santa: “Ha Ha Ha, I Am First“
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Woman mind is cleaner than that of Man’s –
because she change it more often
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GOD Is on Our Team
When I was helpless, he saved me.
As youngsters, we neighborhood kids would play street football. The minute we got home from school we’d drop the books and hit the pavement.
The kid across the street had a dad with a great arm and a strong addiction to football. As soon as he’d pull in the driveaway from work we’d start yelling for him to come and play ball.
He couln’t resist. Out of fairness he’d always ask, “Which team is losing?” Then he would join that team, wich often seemed to be mine.
His appearance in the huddle changed the whole ball game. He was confident, strong, and most of all, he had a plan. We’d circle around him, and he’d look at us and say, “OK boys, here is what we are going to do”.
The other side was groaning before we left the huddle. You see, we not only had a new plan, we had a new leader.
He brought new life to our team. God does precisely the same. We didn’t need a new play; we needed a new plan. We didn’t need to trade positions; we needed a new player. That player is Jesus Christ, God’s firstborn son.
Have a wonderful day wherever you are. I LOVE YOU guys
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God you are worthy my praises Today.
Am humbled by the grace of God.
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Ladies, if your man does not give you time i am here to give it to you.
Now its 22:15 pm.
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A police officer👮 arrested a man for urinating at a clearly marked
“Do Not Urinate Here”❎ offenders would pay R100💸
–
The offender[Man] was asked to pay💸 he gave the police officer R200💸💸 note.
–
The police officer👮 turned to him and said “urinate” again, I don’t have change
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Girlfriend : “ILY”
–
Ronnie : “mmmh! thats so romantic please spell it out”
–
Girlfriend : “I’m Leaving You”
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I’ve never heard Gays saying “Men are
trash ”
.
Ladies are lying Shem
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Ladies, funny Guys are dangerous.
They make you laugh and laugh and laugh…
Then Boom! You’re naked
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I just finished My son’s Ice cream and now.
he’s crying
Should I beat him
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Him: baby can I see you today?
Her: John Cena
Him: what?
Her: you can’t see me.
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