I was in the toilet 🤯then my friend sent me a X video
.
I played the video for 8 mins😎
And there was no sound in it so l didn’t bother myself with the volume 🔊🔊
.
Then l remembered my phone was connected on a Bluetooth speaker in the dining 😭😭😭
.
Now I’m acting crazy 😔😕and this is the 2nd week since I’ve been crazy😢😢😢
Sub Categories
I was just wondering why the GROOM sits on the RIGHT and the BRIDE on the LEFT…
I just remembered my basic ACCOUNTING principles:
INCOME is on the right and EXPENSES is on the left..
Do lesbian leave each other for someone
with a bigger tongue and long fingers as
well?
If her timeline is full of shares, just know that she’s also sharing someone’s Bae..!☝🙄
~•~
She’s a shareholder…
This Morning When I Checked My Whatsapp Messages, I Got 10 Pics From My Ex & She’s Naked In All Of ‘Em… 😑
O Ya Hlanya. 🖕🏽
.
I See Her Intentions… 😏
I’m Not Gonna Buy Her New Clothes.
Girl Is Going Into The Operation Theater For Her Heart Surgery.
She Holds Her Boyfriend’s Hand Tight & Said,
Girl: “I am Having Heart Surgery Today.”
Boy: “Yes I Know, Don’t Worry Baby.”
Girl: “I Love You.”
Boy: “I Love You The Most.”
After The Surgery, Girl Wakes Up And The Only One Next To Her Is Her Father.
Girl: “Where Is He?”
Father (Surprised): “Don’t You Know Who Gave You That Heart?”
Girl: “OMG, What? Noooooo (Starts Crying)”
Father: “I Am Just Kidding, He Went To The Toilet.“
I am a moral philosopher following
Socrates my predecessor and other
rationalist thinkers in the struggle.
Once the leaves fall
They know
There’s no going back
Yet they fall
Gently
Gracefully…
I lost my School bag🎒on the 31st of December
now my mom is forcing me to go to school with a Cooler bag
A sweet grandmother Telephoned St. Joseph’s Hospital. She timidly asked, “Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?” The operator said, “I’ll be glad to help, dear. What’s the name and room number of the patient?” The grandmother in her weak, tremulous voice said, Norma Findlay, Room 302.”
The operator replied, “Let me put you on hold while I check with the nurse’s station for that room.”After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said, “I have good news. Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing well. Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back normal and her Physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged tomorrow.” The grandmother said, “Thank you. That’s wonderful. I was so worried. God bless you for the good News.” The operator replied, “You’re more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter?” The grandmother said, “No, I’m Norma Findlay in Room 302. No one tells me anything.”
Make sure you’re happy today, because tomorrow is borrowed. Might be taken. Live Life and have good long sleep! 💚
~•~•~
2⃣. Don’t make someone your everything because when they leave you’ll have nothing.
If she complains about you coming late at night respect her
and come back early tomorrow morning
You will Laugh – enjoy reading 😉
Five facts about You You You You You You You You You You You You You You You You You
1. You’re so lazy You didn’t read all the You’s.
2. You didn’t notice I put a Yoo.
3. You are now looking to find out.
4. You are laughing because you realise there is no ‘Yoo’ and you’ve been tricked.
5. You are going to
forward this to others who are like ‘YOU’!😜😜
I know at least 13 things about you now:
1. You are holding your phone
2. You are on Whatsapp
3. You just opened my msg.
4. You are now reading it
5. You are human
7. You can’t say the letter “P” without separating your lips
8. You just attempted to do it
9. You are laughing at yourself
10. You have smiles on your face
11. You skipped No.6
12. You just checked to see if there is a No.6
13. You are laughing at this because I caught you, again.
Hahaha is it true? 😃😜😄
If u smiled then forward
☁☁🌞 ☁ ☁
☁ ✈ ☁ 🚁 ☁ ☁ ☁
🏬🏨🏫🏢🏤🏥🏦🏪
🌲 / l🚍 🌳👭
🌳/ 🚘 l 🏃 🌴
🌴/ l 🚔 🌲
🌲/ 🚖 l 🌳
Now that you’ve smiled, don’t be stingy with the smiles, share them With friends!! Just for laughs
Stress busters!
Jacob looked at Joseph and saw
a good son!
The ten brothers looked at Joseph and saw
a useless dreamer!
The travellers looked at Joseph and saw
a slave!!
Potiphar looked at Joseph and saw
a fine servant!!
Potiphar’s wife looked at Joseph and saw
a potential boyfriend!
The prison officers saw in Joseph a prisoner!
How wrong were all of them!!
God looked at Joseph and saw
a Prime Minister of Egypt in waiting!!
Don’t be discouraged by what people see in you!!
Be encouraged by what God sees in You!!
Never underrate the person next to you because you never know what the Lord has deposited in that person.
Your maid may be a Chief Executive Officer in waiting for a company which shall employ your child.
Your garden-boy may be a president in waiting.
(Remember David got the anointing of becoming a King while he was a simple child herding sheep.
Esther was a simple orphaned girl yet she was a Queen in waiting).
Let’s share God’s love and make the world a better place to live. Show that love by sharing this message with those you love.
IT DOESN’T MATTER HOW PEOPLE SEE YOU, IT MATTERS HOW GOD SEES YOU.
If I make u lough and happy more than ur boyfriend does ……
Leave him and come where u belong
That moment you’re in church and the pastor says
tell your neighbor it’s not over