A young man was showing off his new sports car to his girlfriend. She was thrilled at the speed.

“If I do 200Km/h, will you take off your clothes?” he asked.

“Yes!” said his adventurous girlfriend.

And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off all her clothes.

Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car skidded onto some gravel and flipped over. The naked girl was thrown clear, but he was jammed beneath the steering wheel.

“Go and get help!” he cried.

“But I can’t. I’m naked and my clothes are gone!”

“Take my shoe”, he said, “and cover yourself.”

Holding the shoe over her pubes, the girl ran down the road and found a service station. Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station proprietor, “Please help me! My boyfriend’s stuck!”

The proprietor looked at the shoe and said, “There’s nothing I can do…he’s in too far.”

LET ME REPEAT THIS ONE

An African teacher was sent to China to
teach. The first day he entered class, he began by roll-calling.
•
He said “Sheng.” A student said: ”Present.”
•
He called the second name, “Chu muon”
Another student said ”Present.”
•
Suddenly, he sneezed, ”Hatchia” One student seated at the corner stood up
and said, ”Present Sir.”
•
He then exclaimed and said: ”Hmmmm...”
All the students shouted ”Absent.”
•
He got confused and said,”Chai…”
Three students stood up and said:
”Which one of us?”
•
The teacher became more confused and he asked: ”What is wrong?” A student stood up and said: ”Sir, i’m not wrong, i’m called Wong.”
•
The teacher now laughed, ”Hahahaha ”..

A girl said ”Present sir.”
.
The Teacher Collapsed

When you’re Single,You See Happy
Couples Everywhere, But When you get
Married, You See Happy Singles Everywhere*.
*This witchcraft is difficult to explain*

Did the priest lie??
A distinguished young woman on a flight from
Ireland asked the Priest beside her: “Father,
may I ask a favor?”
Priest: “Of course. What may I do for you?
Woman: “Well, I bought an expensive woman’s
electronic hair dryer for my mother’s birthday
that is unopened and well over the Customs
limits, and I’m afraid they’ll confiscate it. Is
there any way you could carry it through
Customs for me……….. Under your robe
perhaps?”
Priest: “I would love to help you, dear, but I
must warn you: I will not lie.”
Woman: “With your honest face, Father, no
one will question you.”
When they got to Customs, she let the priest
go ahead of her.
Custom Officer: “Father, do you have anything
to declare?”
Priest: “From the top of my head down to my
waist, I have nothing to declare. ”
The official thought this answer strange.
Custom Officer: “And what do you have to
declare from your waist to the floor?”
Priest: “I have a marvelous instrument
designed to be used on a woman, but which
is, to date, unused.”
Custom Officer: (Roaring with laughter, said)
“Go ahead Father.” Next!
Did the priest lie?

I knw, Many of you can fail this
…!!!
.. …
Children Loves Cartoons.
We, Men Loves Football.
Women loves___________?

At ABSA bank today in Polokwane Branch, a man goes to the ATM and
withdraws all his money. Then goes inside
the same bank and deposit the same
money he withdrew, telling the bank
officer that, my money is not safe outside
in the ATM…people are just withdrawing
anyhow and they may end up
withdrawing my money. Keep my money
inside the bank please!

Some Men Still Don’t Know The Real Face Of Their Wives Because They Married Make-up Promoters

Can someone please borrow pilot’s uniform
tomorrow I’m going to visit my High school teacher…
she used to make me an example of failure

Yesterday was October
2day is November
No wait..does this mean 2mrw is December?????

Oh wow…guys i told u tht November is not important

Anyone selling a second hand relationship? Even if it has problems, I will fix it.

My pride doesn’t allow me to text any girl or reply via inbox cause I respect what I have. Sometimes Facebook ruins a lots of relationships