A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week, so the magician did the same tricks over and over again. There was one problem. The captain’s parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick. Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show “Look, it’s not the same hat!” or, “Look, he’s hiding the flowers under the table,” or “Hey, all the cards the ace of spades?” The magician was furious, but couldn’t do anything. It was, after all, the captain’s parrot. Then the ship sank. The magician found himself on a piece of wood in the middle of the sea with, as fate would have it, the parrot. They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word. This went on for a day and then another and then another.
Finally on the fourth day, the parrot could not hold back and said,
“OK, I give up. Where’s the ship?”

A Girl who wants to cheat will cheat no matter what…even If you buy an aeroplane for her she will start dating the pilot..😕😕

If you like take her out, feed her until she can’t walk again she will still crawl to another guy.

Wife asked: What are u doing?
Husband: Am Killing mosquitoes?
Wife: How many did u kill?
Husband: Total 5. Two females, 3 males.
Wife: How do u know their genders?
Husband: 2 were near my wallet and 3 near the beer bottle

A little boy asks his Dad: What’s between mom’s legs? The father answers: Paradise, my son. The kid asks again: What’s between your legs? The father replies: The key to the paradise. The son says: Piece of advice Dad, change the lock, the neighbour has a spare key.

When a woman says that she loves her children more than her husband
* She is clearly telling a lie *

She can leave her children with her neighbours
* But she will not leave her husband with a neighbour for a minute *

Some idiot found my Bank card in Public when I was paying for my groceries literally 30 seconds after I dropped it!!! And he tried to keep it!! I kept tapping him on the shoulder to tell him to give it back because I saw him pick it up! But this idiot denied having it!! 😡😡😡 This is where it gets interesting 🙄.
A bigger idiot kept tapping the… See More

*My neighbour called the police because I was smoking weed in my backyard.* *The police got here and asked where the weed was, I said I smoked it all.* *They said where did you buy it, I said from my neighbour…* *now they’re at his house*
*Learn To Mind Your Own Business!!!*

My ex is now a lesbian and she’s threating
to get her revenge by beating me

Once she says “You’re my favorite couple”….just know she
wants your man😒😏

Struuu bob