Q.What wud u do?
,,,U r a man nd hv rented
a 3room house with ur wife.Ur lady friend
needs a place to stay & u decide to offer
her a room in ur house.Aftr a couple of
months u fall 4 her nd u start shagging
her!One day u lie to ur wife that u r going
out myb to a funeral so that u sleep at the
other room with ur lady friend!In the middle
of the nyt ur wife knoks and says ”chomi
can u pls give me a condom”,,,,?
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That moment when you eat soft porridge with fork and knife
and everyone at Breakfast table stares at you like
you have your intestine out.
Like really,
come on this is 2018 not 2017 things must change
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A side chick can make a guy forget about his main chick by saying: “Baby how many rounds can you handle today?” 😋👌
~•~•~•~
Salute the power a side chick has..!!
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A man try to catch the moon he hide under a big tree until the moon was just above the horizon and a inch above the sea level.he got himself up jump to catch the moon but,
to his suprise he was on a bed with a broken leg and hand
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A young man was saved from alcohol by the knowledge of Jesus Christ. His life took a radical turn for the good. This continued for many months, and everyone was amazed and pleased with his progress. During the cold winter months, this young man was walking home. He was delayed by the raising and lowering of a bridge across a river. To escape the cold wind and snow, he stepped into a bar where they serve alcoholic drinks. In that setting where he had been many times before, he gave in to temptation and ordered a drink. He ordered another and another. When he left the bar, he was intoxicated. Two young men from the church he attended saw him leaving the bar and followed him part of the way home. What would they do? Would they tell everyone that this young man was drinking once again? Would they gossip about him? Would they ridicule him and discourage him? No. They took him home that night and got him sober. They told him that no one else would ever know what had happened that night. They encouraged him. The next morning this young man was sober and sorry for what he had done. He knelt with his friends and prayed to God for forgiveness and for strength to never give in alcohol again. He became a minister of the Gospel. How different it might have been if those friends had not treated his sin with a loving attitude. Love bears all things, we should take this approach with other people. Instead of trying to broadcast all the dirt and filth we know about other people through gossip, let us speak of others the best we can. Let us quietly work to help others correct their faults. Let us be humble when we are aware of the faults of others, knowing that we ourselves are not perfect.
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If I had my life to live over again,
I would find you sooner
so that I would love you longer.
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Handsome men are not funny but Those Ugly ones will make u laugh,
untill u laugh urself into a relationship
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I overhead my mom praying for me saying
“no alcohol shall touch my son’s lips” I laughed and said, I’m gonna use a straw.
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You’re not black enough if your mother didn’t tell you
to reduce your age in a taxi
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I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING ….
Stolen:
I sent R1000 to a wrong number using ewallet
After realizing this, Icalmed down and sent him/her this text message:
“Hello Dear, I hope you got the membership welcome fee of R1000 to our Satanism Church. We are glad and looking forward to having you with us.
That is just the beginning of the richest life you are about to start living. We hope you are as excited to be joining our church as we are. As I just said, that is a
welcome salary.
We are having a meeting tonight whereby we will slaughter 3 people in celebration of the start of this month. Please invite over any female person you may be close to. Lets meet tonight at 8pm at YOUR PLACE.
If you haven’t shown any interest in our church and you believe this is a mistake, kindly send the money back to this number otherwise welcome to our Church. See you tonight.”
10 Minutes later, I got a message saying send another R1000 my friend is also interested’.
I fainted, people are so broke these days.
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I tossed and turned the whole night…
I can’t eat..I can’t drink.
My neighbours bought a new car and a lounge suite.
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When they can’t afford Makeup Anymore they Upload a Pic
with the Caption *My sick face*
Girls why giving yourselves Pressure..
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When I was mentally ill
I thought one girlfriend was enough
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Fred is 32 years old and he is still single.
One day a friend asked, “Why aren’t you married? Can’t you find a woman who will be a good wife?”
Fred replied, “Actually, I’ve found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn’t like them.”
His friend thinks for a moment and says, “I’ve got the perfect solution, just find a girl who’s just like your mother.”
A few months later they meet again and his friend says, “Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?”
With a frown on his face, Fred answers, “Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much.”
The friend said, “Then what’s the problem?”
Fred replied, “My father doesn’t like her.”
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Imagine you are a parent, your daughter is in form 3 and she is going to school. You escorts her to the bus station and after 3 hrs you are told that the bus she was in has had an accident and no one has survived. As you are making funeral arrangements you get a call from your daughter saying ” mom, I was not on that bus, my boyfriend insisted I spend two days at his house before I go” What would you do as a parent? How would you feel?
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Teacher-i gave u essay 2write on dogs,y didnt u write..
.
.
.
Sam-whenever i go 2write on dog,it runs away
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