I thought I knew English until I heard my neighbour explaining the difference between Email and Gmail,
(1)Email – the mails which are sent using Electricity
(2)Gmail -the mails which are sent using a Generator
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Today I caught myself smiling for no reason,
then I realized I was thinking about you.
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Are you aware that when the relationship is still new
there’s no Network problem..!!?
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Most girls/ladies in the church raise up their
hands during praise an worship just to
show guys they have no rings
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I was at the customer-service desk, returning a pair of jeans that was too tight.
“Was anything wrong with them?” the clerk asked.
“Yes,” I said. “They hurt my feelings.”
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Are you happy in your relationship or I should give you my number ?
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Guys that don’t have money but their girlfriends love them so much
and are loyal to them,
please what formula are you using?
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A man was walking
down the street when he was
accosted by a particularly dirty
and shabby-looking homeless
man who asked him for a couple
of cash for dinner.
The man took out his wallet,
extracted 1k and asked, “If I give
you this money, will you buy
some beer with it instead of
dinner?”
“No, I had to stop drinking years
ago,” the homeless man replied.
“Will you use it to go fishing
instead of buying food?” the man
asked.
“No, I don’t waste time fishing,”
the homeless man said. “I spend
all my time trying to stay alive.”
“Will you spend this on green
fees at a golf course instead of
food?” the man asked.
“Are you NUTS!” replied the
homeless man. “I haven’t played
golf in 20 years!”
“Will you spend the money on a
woman in the red light district
instead of food?” the man asked.
“What disease would I get for
1k?” exclaimed the homeless
man.
“Well,” said the man, “I’m not
going to give you the money.
Instead,
I’m going to take you home for a
terrific dinner cooked by my
wife.”
The homeless man was
astounded.
“Won’t your wife be furious with
you for doing that? I know I’m
dirty and I probably smell pretty
disgusting.”
The man replied, “That’s okay.
It’s important for her to see what
a man looks like after he has
given up beer, fishing, golf and
sex.”
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You have enemies? Good.
That means you’ve stood up for something,
sometime in your life. -Churchill
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Yaz abe mubi umuntu
angafanelwa ama’Earphone
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Can I take your picture?? I love to collect pictures of natural disasters.
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Once An Indian And An American Both Were Friends.
They Both Went Into A Chocolate Store.
Everybody Is Busy In The Store So American Steal 3 Chocolates And Put Those In The Pocket.
Both Came Out From The Store Then American Said: “Man, I’m The Best Thief Ever, I Stole 3 Chocolates And No One Saw Me, You Can’t Beat That.”
Indian Replied: “This Is Nothing, You Wanna See Something Better, Lets Go Back To The Shop And I Will Show You Real Stealing.”
So They Went To The Counter And Indian Said To The Shop Boy: “Do You Wanna See Magic?”
Shop Boy Replied: “Yes, Of Course.”
Indian Said: “Give Me One Chocolate Bar.”
Shop Boy Gave Him One, And He Ate It.
Indian Asked For The Second, And He Ate That As Well.
Indian Asked For The Third, And Finished That One Too.
The Shop Boy Asked: “But Where Is The Magic?”
Indian Replied: “Check In My Friends Pocket, And You’ll Find Them.”
You Can’t Beat An Indian.
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can someone teach me how to stop being a fast replier,
i look desperate
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My gf was scruitinising my phone n now she is boiling water i think she wants to make me sum nice tea…. I can’t wait!!!
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They offer you a shoulder to cry on & laugh behind your back
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Women don’t see it when they’re being rejected, they just say:
“The dude has poor communication skills”..
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