I once break the record of running , 100
meters in 11sec….but the only witness was
the dog chasing me .!!!
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Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room.
The teacher says, “Why are you arguing?”
One boy answers, “We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie.”
“You should be ashamed of yourselves,” said the teacher, “When I was your age I didn’t even know what a lie was.”
The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.
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I saw that you were perfect and I loved you.
Then I saw that you were not perfect
and I loved you even more…
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I passed by an atm and saw the guy who owes me R1600 in the queue and then when he saw me approach him he was like is this the taxi rank asking people around him
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Me : Bro I Got Two Bad News For You…
Him : Combine Them…
Me : Your Girlfriend Is Cheating On Both Of Us…
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FIFA is currently investigating how Orlando pirates
went to FIFA world cup as Panama
Coz the 6-1 score looks familiar
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Sanzali Once lost in a forest as he was struggling to find his way out he came across a lion and the lion started chasing him so he began to run until he became tired so he kneelled down and closed his eyes playing to God to save him, When he opened his eyes he saw the lion also kneeing down praying, so Sanzali asked the lion why are you a Muslim? And the lion said shut up don’t you pray before you eat?
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l had a Fight with my Roommate .. Now he’s Watching Tv “How to get away with Murder”
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They Know They’re Ugly When They Post Pics And Add Captions Like:
👇👇👇
“My Smile Tho, My Nose Tho, My Eyes Tho, My Lips Tho, My Butts Tho”.
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I’ve never heard Gays saying “Men are
trash ”
.
Ladies are lying Shem
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a frend asked a frend: “Ndoda how do i know if my woman is a virgin?”
frend relpied: “just before you have sex with her, show her yo ‘THING’ and ask her what it is. if she says its a PENIS then she is a virgin, if she says ita aCOCK then u know she has been around for a long time”
the frend followed the frend’s advice ans showed his new galfriend his THING and asked what it was. She rerplied tht it was a PENIS.
“Phew!” the man sighed, “I thot u were going to say its a COCK!”
Galfrend: “Of course not, a COCK is twice bigger”
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Yesterday is for memories
Tomorrow is an imagination
But today is real gift
have a pleasant day.
Good Morning
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I have notice one common thing about all the Lesbians
.
The are all dressing like “John Cena” and I don’t know why?
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Having a twin is cool, the problem starts when you are drunk and find your twin in bed and be like: “Oh I’ve already slept lemme go back to tarven”..
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There Are Two Ways of
Washing Blankets…
–
Whites: Washing Machine♻🕐
.
Blacks: 👣👣👣👣👣
.
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I believe Pillow fight with bae must have ended in 2018.
This 2019, we are using frying pan!
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