Any woman cheating on her man this year may u catch fire, break your leg, loose your front teeth…

Any man cheating on his woman…Father forgive us and teach us how to love for we don’t know what we are doing.

BAE means Bills And Expenses!!!!!

Dont argue with me

Ladies and their nonsense behaviours.
I said we should meet in front of restaurant and you’re already inside reading the menu ..

Finish reading and meet me outside let’s discuss.

I hate indiscipline.

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings several times until one of the men engages the hands free speaker-function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

MAN: “Hello?”
WOMAN: “Honey, it’s me. Are you at the club?”
MAN: “Yes.”
WOMAN: “I am at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat. It’s only R1500. Is it OK if I buy it?”
MAN: “Sure, go ahead if you like it that much.”
WOMAN: “I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2012 models. I saw one I really liked.”
MAN: “How much?”
WOMAN: “R450000”
MAN: “OK, but for that price I want it with all the options.”
WOMAN: “Great! Oh, and one more thing. The house we wanted last year is back on the market. They’re asking R950000.”
MAN: “Well, then go ahead and give them an offer, but just offer 900,000.”
WOMAN: “OK. I’ll see you later! I love you!”
MAN: “Bye, I love you, too.”

The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are looking at him in astonishment.

Then he asks: “Anyone know who this phone belongs to?”

Never show a Lady that you’re more fluent than her in English
while you’re out. Trust me, it will be your last date!

2019 Will Probably The Last Year That Ends With
“Teen” For The Rest Of Our Lives

I really hate it when 2000 kids uses makeup instead of their baby powder

SCHOOL FACTS:In every class, there is a
1. The thief.
2. The shy guy.
3. The three best friends.
4. The back seat guys with joke.
5. The Nerd that never gets High mark.
6. The clean guys.
7. The gossip square with low marks.
8. The late comer.
9. The student that always turn out to be thefirst
to come to class.
10. The cute guy who doesn’t wantanything to
do with girls.
11. The High IQ’s
12. The pastor.
13. The talkative .
14. The one always with the annoying laugh.
15. The guy that is always in the midst ofgirls.
16. The girl always in the midst of guys.
17. The tutor.
18. The perfume crew.
19.The copier.
Give a number to yourself…. No lie

Rabbits Jump And They Live For 8 Years.

Dogs Run And They Live For 15 Years.

Turtles Do Nothing And They Live For 150 Years.

“Today’s Lesson Learned“

Girlfriend giving house directions to
her Boyfriend:
“come to the front gate of my
apartment where you dropped me,
look for flat 9A,
you’ll find a lift on your right. Then, hit 9 with ur ELBOW…
And get out of the lift you’ll find my
flat on left.
hit the doorbell with your ELBOW &
I’ll get to open the door for you”

Boy Friend: dear that seems easy but why am I hitting buttons with my
ELBOWS only?

Girl Friend: “OMG!! Are you coming empty handed?