Yep every time you think you got the great life.
Then you walk into your real life jokes on you. Lol
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Yep every time you think you got the great life.
Then you walk into your real life jokes on you. Lol
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Stop Wearing Overalls While You’re Unemployed
God Might Think You’re Already Sorted
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That happy moment
when your friend returns your money
after you have almost forgot about it..
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You fall in love with the little things about someone, like the sound of their laughter and the way their smile forms
–
• True
– or
• False??
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JUST FOR FUN.
Type “I am a big” and keep pressing the middle prediction. Let your keyboard form the sentence.
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Smoking reduces your life by 5 minutes
Laughter prolongs your life by 5 minutes
–
Conclusion : a laughing smoker never dies.
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Since when do men bath everyday
We are losing our culture
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Most of you don’t have haters.
You just have people telling you the truth that you don’t want to hear!
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I want to hold your hands,
look in your eyes and enjoy everything
that you want to say to me.
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Pain Of Deleting A Nice Conversation Because You Are Dating A
Detective
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NAKED TRUTH
*Strange things we do in Africa in the name of “It’s Our Culture*
*1. We care more for the dead than we do for the living!*
*2. We spend more to bury a person than we do to save their life.*
*3. We will not travel to go see a sick relative but will travel to bury him /her*
*4. People will rarely respect you while alive but will want to “pay their last respects” to your casket.*
*5. A person may NEVER receive roses in their entire life but they will get lots dumped on their graveyard!*
*6. We will spend a night at a neighbour’s funeral and it will be our first time to see the inside of their house!*
*7. No one gives a damn to know your village until you die and they will all fill car after car to “escort” your corpse*
*8. We will take the dead to the mosque/temple/church knowing fully well they had nothing to do with worship while alive.*
*9. We might not have granite tops in our kitchens but use the granite in the graveyard!*
*10. An entire village might not have a single house with cement floors but the only place with cement will be a graveyard!*
*It is proposed we have “Cultural Reforms”. We have a culture of “hypocrisy”
… a culture that is “Pro-death” and NOT “Pro-life!”*
*We need to value life BEFORE death.*
*Best person ever who came to my heart left with scars but l will never forget that touch* Please love me while I am alive, show me your kindness now that I need it, your presence at my funeral will never make up for your absence when I have the greatest need of you. Do it now than regret later.
*This got me thinking
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Why can’t Satan just swallow his pride and
go and apologise to God so that we can
go back to the Garden of Eden and
stay naked coz clothes are too expensive.
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I know she didn’t want me ..
But I loved her anyway
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Two engineers arrived at work at the same time and one said, “You normally walk to work. Where did you get such a great bike?”
The second engineer replied, “Well, I was walking home yesterday, took a shortcut through the park, and was minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, ‘Take what you want.'”
The second engineer nodded approvingly, “Good choice, the clothes probably wouldn’t have fit.”
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They say that the new super computer knows everything. A sceptical man came and asked the computer, “Where is my father?” The computer bleeped for a short while, and then came back with, “Your father is fishing in Michigan.” The sceptical man said triumphantly, “You see? I knew this was nonsense. My father has been dead for twenty years.” “No” replied the super computer immediately, “Your mother’s husband has been dead for twenty years. Your father just landed a three pound trout!”
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My girlfriend found me kissing her sister ..
now she’s boiling water
i think she wanna make tea for us
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