He was a widower and she a widow.
They had met for a number of years being high school classmates and having attended class reunions in the past without fail.
This 50th anniversary of their class, they had a wonderful evening, their spirits high.The widower throwing admiring glances across the table. The widow smiling coyly back at him.
Finally, he picked up courage to ask her, “Will you marry me?”
After about six seconds of careful consideration, she answered, “Yes…, yes I will!”
The evening ended on a happy note for the widower. But the next morning he was troubled.
Did she say “Yes” or did she say “No?”
He couldn’t remember. Try as he would, he just could not recall. He went over the conversation of the previous evening, but his mind was blank.
He remembered asking the question but for the life of him he could not recall her response. With fear and trepidation he picked up the phone and called her.
First, he explained that he couldn’t remember as well as he used to. Then he reviewed the past evening.
As he gained a little more courage he then inquired of her. “When I asked if you would marry me, did you say “Yes” or did you say “No?”
“Why you silly man, I said ‘Yes. Yes I will.’ And I meant it with all my heart.”
The widower was delighted. He felt his heart skip a beat.
Then she continued, “And I am so glad you called, because I couldn’t remember who asked me!”

Santa Went To Interview For FBI Agent.

Interviewer: “Who Killed Abraham Lincoln?”

Santa: “Thanks For Giving The Job Sir,
I Would Immediately Start Investigation.“

A man boarded a taxi going home after a long day at work but before the taxi took off, the Man saw his Wife with another Man entering a Lodge.. ” Furious😠😠, he asked the taxi drive if he could do some extra Money up to R1000 paid in cash!! Nd the taxi drive agreed ” Then the Man took out a picture of his Wife showing it to the Taxi driver nd say.. ” Go in there nd drag her out now, Slap her if you have to😠😠 ” Nd the Taxi driver rushed inside.. After few minutes, the Taxi driver came out with the wrong Woman, Slapping, dragging nd Calling her names… Then the Man started shouting ” You stupid Fool, You’ve got the wrong Woman, Just let her go You idiot 😠😠😠 ” Then the Taxi driver replied ” Just Relax Sir, this one is Mine, just take care of her while i go back to get yours

You want your husband to be very good in bed but you don’t give him time to go for training outside.
Are you normal my sister , is your head paining you?

You can’t be born in February
And be
Normal even the month is not
Complete…

*STUDENT OBTAINED 0% IN AN EXAM!*

I WOULD HAVE GIVEN HIM 100%! EACH ANSWER IS ABSOLUTELY GRAMMATICALLY CORRECT AND FUNNY TOO. THE TEACHER HAS NO SENSE OF HUMOR.

*Q1: IN WHICH BATTLE DID NAPOLEON DIE?*

“`HIS LAST BATTLE.“`

*Q2: WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE SIGNED?*

“`AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE.“`

*Q3: RIVER RAVI FLOWS IN WHICH STATE?*

“`LIQUID.“`

*Q4: WHAT IS THE MAIN REASON FOR DIVORCE?*

“`MARRIAGE.“`

*Q5: WHAT IS THE MAIN REASON FOR FAILURE?*

“`EXAMS.“`

*Q6: WHAT CAN YOU NEVER EAT FOR BREAKFAST?*

“`LUNCH & DINNER.“`

*Q7: WHAT LOOKS LIKE HALF AN APPLE?*

“`THE OTHER HALF.“`

*Q8: IF YOU THROW A RED STONE INTO THE BLUE SEA WHAT WILL IT BECOME?*

“`WET.“`

*Q9: HOW CAN A MAN GO EIGHT DAYS WITHOUT SLEEPING?*

“`NO PROBLEM, HE SLEEPS AT NIGHT.“`

*Q10: HOW CAN YOU LIFT AN ELEPHANT WITH ONE HAND?*

“`YOU WILL NEVER FIND AN ELEPHANT THAT HAS ONE HAND“`

*Q11: IF YOU HAD THREE APPLES AND FOUR ORANGES IN ONE HAND AND FOUR APPLES AND THREE ORANGES IN OTHER HAND, WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE?*

“`VERY LARGE HANDS“`

*Q12: IF IT TOOK EIGHT MEN TEN HOURS TO BUILD A WALL, HOW LONG WOULD IT TAKE FOUR MEN TO BUILD IT?*

“`NO TIME AT ALL, THE WALL IS ALREADY BUILT“`

*Q13: HOW CAN YOU DROP A RAW EGG ONTO A CONCRETE FLOOR WITHOUT CRACKING IT?*

“`ANY WAY YOU WANT, CONCRETE FLOORS ARE VERY HARD TO CRACK.“`

*Spread some laughter, share the cheer. Let’s be happy, while we’re here!

It’s funny how ladies think they can do everything that a man can do…. like seriously can you wear the same underwear for seven days

When asked the similarities between

Woman 💃🏼
&
Alcohol 🥃

Shakespeare replied,

They both have the amazing quality of giving Pleasure at night and Headache in the morning !

Me: Have a nice day

Her: Don’t tell me what to do

A newly wedded girl was being welcomed
at the husband’s home in a traditional
manner.
She was asked to give a little speech.
She addressed as follows:
“My dear family members, I thank you for welcoming me in my new home and
family“,
she said “Firstly, with my presence i would
not want to create any
inconveniences by my being here. I mean
that I don’t want you all to change your way of life, your routine.“
“What do you mean my child?” asked her
Mother-In-Law.
What i mean is:
Those who used to wash dishes must carry
on washing them. Those who used to do the laundry must carry on doing it. Those
who cook shouldn’t stop on my account.
Those who used
to clean should continue cleaning.
As for me, I am here just to control
your son!.

Dating a blind person is not a problem…
The problem starts when they don’t know where the relationship is going