One Day A Man Was Driving Fast, And He Got Pulled Over By A Police Officer.

Officer: “What’s Your Excuse For Going Over The Speed Limit?”

Man In Hurry: “I’m Sorry Officer, But It’s A Matter Of Life And Death”

Officer: “What Do You Mean”

Man: “You See Officer, There’s A Woman Waiting For My At My House And I Have To Go To Her”

Officer: “That’s Not A Death Matter”

Man: “It Will Be, If My Wife Gets There First“

My favourite memory of my ex is when she left 💕

My phone was stolen in class and I told them to return it back
before I do something that I have done in johannesburg…
Classmates:What did u do at johannesburg?.??
Tebza:I bought a new phone!!!

I always hear people saying legends are born in January,
February, March and all the other months of the year😑
.
Please my question is, in which month are
thieves, Gays, Rapists, Ritiualists, Abortionists, e.t.c born?

Between white sugar n brown sugar
Which one has more sugar?

Little Johnny walks into his mother’s room and catches her topless.
”Mommy, Mommy, what are those?” he says pointing to her chest.
“Well, son,” she says, These are Mommies balloons, and when you die, they inflate and float you up to heaven.
”Incredibly, he appears to believe this explanation and goes off quite satisfied.
Two days later while his mother is making tea, Johnny rushes into the kitchen.
“Mommy, mommy, Aunt Eliza is dying!”
“What do you mean?” says his mother.
“Well she’s out in the garden shed, lying on the floor.
Both of her balloons are out, Dad’s blowing them up, and she keeps yelling, ”God, I’m coming! God, I’m coming!”