When u are being beaten up in a fight and then someone shouts “let them fight”
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Bro u will think the devil is the referee

Skinny Chicks With Small Butts Be Like “Don’t
Touch My Butt” Instead Of “Don’t Touch My ass bones”

3 common lies from guys:
I’m sorry,
I love you,
I won’t hurt u.

3 common lies from girls:
I’m fine,
I’m not mad at u,
I don’t love you.

*I know there are so many things dat won’t be tolerated in 2018 buh these are some random QUOTES dat are free to enter 2018*

1. Being kissed does not mean you are loved.
Ask Jesus about Judas😂😂😂😂

2. 80% of cute girls are single because all boys
think she definitely has a boyfriend!
😂😂😂😂

3. Welcome to Africa where Jesus sends you a
whatsapp message and threatens to kill you if
you do not send it to 20 people😂😂😂

4. No matter how light skinned you are, your
shadow will always be black😂😂😂

5. Gaining weight while you owe me money is a
sign of Disrespect. # LOLZ😂😂😂😂

6. The distance between Egypt and Israel is
about 613km but it took moses and Israelites 40
years to complete their journey. On average each day
they walked only 43 metres, yes only 43 metres,
almost half of what Usain Bolt do in 5 seconds. I just
wish if moses was around to explain this
Laziness😂😂😂😂

7. The reason why some other guys treats you
better than your boyfriend is because they
haven’t slept with you yet.😂😂😂😂

8. Some ladies will be matching purses with
clothes But cannot match babies to their real Daddies #
WINKS *😂😂

9. MARY was a virgin and she married a
carpenter (JOSEPH). You are not a virgin and you are
waiting for a billionaire to marry you?
I will not say anything😳😂😂😂😂

10. No African girl will choose six packs over
six cars, so stop going to the gym and go to
work # FACT😂😂😂😂

11. If the government would ban women from
using makeup, a lot of kids will not recognise
their mothers😂😂😂😂

12. The only person a woman attentively
listens to and obeys sincerely and does exactly
as he say is a PHOTOGRAPHER, otherwise if you’re not a
photographer, sit down and be strong😂😂😂😂

13. You haven’t moved on if you still remember
your Ex’s phone number. I’m not gonna argue
with you.
😂😂😂

14. Slim Girls who go for jogging at dawn, what do
you want to lose again…
Your life?😂

She will text you saying gudnyt honey nd still text another guy
same time nd say i’m at your gate sweet!!

Have you noticed when a rich guy posts something on fb. They all rush to comment, “its true boss” or “you are right boss” even if it doesn’t make sense. But for those that are not rich like me,we have to be extra funny or making a lot of sense just to get people’s reactions.
My brother, its not easy to be poor.trust me

Dating a virgin is funny
You touch her nose then…
she be like “bae im afraid i will get pregnant”

Buying bras and pants for your lady and another niqqa be removing them…That’s life my bro…we live to share

I think Facebook should send notifications like:
“Dineo and 12 others just ignored your post, would u like to unfriend them?”

Don’t be jealous when God is blessing your neighbour.
It means he is in the neighbourhood.

So today I hugged a Xhosa girl immediately I received a bank notification that R125,00 has been deducted from my account

In a “Mental Hospital” of 38 patient’s, a journalist asks the Doctor: How do you determine whether to admit a mental patient or not to?

Dr: “Well, we fill a bathtub with water and then give the patient;
(a). a teaspoon,
(b). a glass,
(c). a bucket,
and ask them to empty the bathtub.”

Journalist: “Oh, obviously a normal person would use the bucket because its bigger.”

Dr: “No, a normal person would pull the drain plug! Please go to bed No.39.
We will start further investigations on you!”

Maybe i should Pretend to be gay so that
my crush can bath in front of me.

“A Zimbabwean man walks into a Capetown
bank and asks to see the loan officer. He says
he is going to Zimbabwe on holiday for two
weeks and wants to borrow R20. The bank
officer says the bank will need some kind of
security for such a loan, so the man handed
over the keys of his new BMW M3 parked on
the street in front of the bank. Everything is
checked out, and the bank agrees to accept the
car as collateral for the loan. An employee
drives the BMW into the bank’s underground
garage and parks it there. Two weeks later, the
man returns, repays the R20 and the interest,
which comes to R25,41. The loan officer says,
“We are very happy to have had your business,
and this transaction has worked out very nicely,
but we are a little puzzled. While you were
away, we checked you out and found that you
are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is,
why you would bother to borrow R20? The
Zimbabwean man replied, “Where else in
Capetown can I park my car safely for two
weeks and pay only R25.41?” Zimbabweans will
always be Zimbabwean and intelligent
too……proudly