I want to eat but my friend is showing no
signs of leaving

You know girls…You can never satisfy them because you can just rob a bank for her and she goes like:
“Why did you rob CAPITEC instead of FNB?”

I can’t date a girl who pronounces ‘R’ as “Ggg”,
we wont get maggied because our Gelationship wont last.

A man bought a lie detector robot that slaps people who lie.
He decided to test it at dinner: …

Dad: Son, where were you today during school hours?

Son: At school
(robot slaps the son and he immediately changes his mind)

Okay, okay, I went to the movies! Dad: Which one?

Son: Harry Potter (robot slaps the son again!)

Okay Alright, I was watching dirty movies.

Dad: What? When I was your age I didn’t even know
what dirty moves are (robot slaps dad)

Mom: Hahahahaha! After all he is your Son!
(robot gives Mom a hot dirty slap)

Cartoons brings children together and
soccer brings man together.
Please I want to know what brings woman together?

Why all these Pastors and Prophets who are currently here in South Africa can’t go to other African countries like Libya, Zimbabwe, Tunisia, Egypt and Morocco etc, to do the dirty works there too? Why is it seems like everyone who want to become Pastor/Prophet the first choice is to come to South Africa?

why are people so afraid of snakes ? 🐍
.
.
the poor animal just wants to kill you that’s all.

Husband having an affair with Sophie.Sophie lived next door.Friday morng husband lied to his wife that he’s going to Durban for seminar.He packs his laptop and bags and tell his wife she won’t find him wen she comes back from work,and slips next door to Sophie’s house.Saturday morng he woke up smiling after a lovely night with Sophie.Wearing Sophie’s gown,he goes to the bathroom to his surprise thru the window he sees another man walking around his house wearing his gown,the one he left at home.He shouts thru the window,”Hey wena! What are u doing in my house?”The man shouts back:Futsek”Who are u?The father of dis house is in Durban”Husband replies,”I will beat u once l return from Durban”.

In America, when two lovers stare at each
other, they kiss. In Africa, you will hear
something like :- “Why are you looking at
me, do you want to give me money? ” Life
is so beautiful in Africa.

Nothing is as painful than being phoned
by your crush telling you to check your wall
& respond but you can’t tell her you’re on
free mode

Alcohol tastes nicer
when you’ve already bought your kids Xmas clothes.

Ladies, when you are hurt does removing your whatsapp profile picture make you feel better? 🤔