My wrk mate
Just received 2 sms from his wife
First sms: Let’s break up now, its all over
Second sms: sorry, sorry, sorry, that was not for you.
Now he does not know what to do, lets help

When two slenders walking too close
to each other they look like 11 o’clock .

A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan. ‘What was that for?’ the man asked. The wife replied, ‘That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket’. The man then said ‘When I was at the races last week, Jenny was the name of the horse I bet on.’ The wife apologized and went on with the housework. Three days later the man is watching TV when his wife bashes him on the head with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him unconscious. Upon re-gaining consciousness the man asked why she had hit again.
Wife replied, ‘Your horse phoned’

Little Johnny walks into his mother’s room and catches her topless.
”Mommy, Mommy, what are those?” he says pointing to her chest.
“Well, son,” she says, These are Mommies balloons, and when you die, they inflate and float you up to heaven.
”Incredibly, he appears to believe this explanation and goes off quite satisfied.
Two days later while his mother is making tea, Johnny rushes into the kitchen.
“Mommy, mommy, Aunt Eliza is dying!”
“What do you mean?” says his mother.
“Well she’s out in the garden shed, lying on the floor.
Both of her balloons are out, Dad’s blowing them up, and she keeps yelling, ”God, I’m coming! God, I’m coming!”

What is uMhlola?
uMhlola is when you give a lift to a
beautiful girl and she faints in your car. You take
her to the hospital and the doctor says she is
pregnant and congratulates you that you will soon be
a father . You shout that you are not the father but
the girl insist that you are the father……
Things are now getting Mhlolaful you now
require a DNA test to prove that you are not the
father…
Things become Mhlolostic when the doctor
comes with results saying you cannot be the father
because you are infertile…. You are relieved but on
your way home you remember you are married with
three kids at home!…..
Now you are extremely Mhlolicious
Now you begin to ask yourself who is the father
to those three kids?… Now you get home to find out
the father to those kids is your gateman … You
are now Mhlolaned
You then decide to go to your mum to tell her the
sad news… Your mum with tears running down her
cheeks tells you ‘my son I’m so sorry….your dad isn’t
your real dad’…. Then you know things are
Mhlolacated
And if you dont forward this you are a
Mhlolacriosis

If a woman asks u a question,
it’s better to tell her the truth because
chances are she’s asking you
because she already knows the answer.

The funniest thing in class is when the teacher
cracks a joke and no one laughs