Have you ever thought that the Mouse you killed
was thinking that it is part of your family?
Exactly you’re just thinking for yourself
you don’t care about others feelings

Some girls of nowadays set a 16 digit password to
lock their phone,
while their legs password is “SLIDE TO UNLOCK”

My sister stop asking guys what they do
for a living, they will lie, just take them to
bed and count how many round they can
go
1 round – rich guy
2 rounds – doing well in life
3rounds – unemployed
4rounds – broke as hell
Don’t be deceived by there looks

Google is the second fastest searching
engine…….. A Guy’s eye remain the first
when searching for a beautiful girl in a
crowd.

A cop pulls a guy over: Sir, why were you speeeding? Officer, I wanted to get home quickly, before I became really drunk.
….
I really love you ppl

A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, “How many women can a man marry?” “Sixteen,” the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. “How do you know that?” “Easy,” the little boy said. “All you have to do is add it up, like the Bishop said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer”

*My friend invited me to a wedding and while sitting I whispered to a person sitted next to me:*

*ME* the bride is ugly..
*PERSON:* if you dont mind, thats my daughter
*ME:* ooh am sorry I didn’t know you are the father..
*PERSON:* idiot am not the father, am the mother..
*ME:* heeeh

They say milk gives strength. I drank 4 cups of milk yet i wasn’t able to move a wall, but when i drank 4 bottles of beer i saw walls moving by themselves. These scientists are bloody liars

Go To The Nearest Somalian Supermarket
And Make Him Angry , You Will Hear Him Saying
“Am Not Your Friend My Friend”

Yesterday my boss sent me to buy a 2litre of milk

Then I found out only 1litres available,
and
turned back and told him..

He called me by names, and even told me straight that I’m stupid why I didn’t use my brain and buy two 1litres of milk to make it 2litre

And today he sent me to buy pair of size 6 sleepers shoes
I got all the sizes except size 6
So I used my brain and bought two pairs of size 3
To make it 6
Without a word, he used sign language
To alerted me to wait for him out side
Now he’s busy with his computer ,
I’m sure he want to give me some bonus end of the month

A real wife sleep on the floor when
her husband bring His side chick home
.
You must respect your man

hate people who use big English words
to make us feel perspicacious

Black people don’t measure salt . We
sprinkle salt until we hear the spirit of our
ancestors whisper to us “It’s enough my
child”.

In America, when two lovers stare at each
other, they kiss. In Africa, you will hear
something like :- “Why are you looking at
me, do you want to give me money? ” Life
is so beautiful in Africa.

Dear ladies.
Please when you decide to cheat on your
man, do it with a guy that your man would
defeat in a fight.
You cant hurt your man twice.

LADIES!!! LADIES!!! LADIES!!!
Wife: Honey, someone is beeping to your
phone
Husband: Who is that, would u check for
me?
Wife: No problem honey
(wife pulls phone from a charger and
checks the one who beeped)
Wife: What!!!!!? Who is this one you
saved…beautiful in your phone!!!?
Husband: Me!!!? There is no such name in
ma phone, let me see…..
Wife: See what, you know her, she is your
girlfriend… You are a cheat!!!
Husband: My sweetest wife, this is not
beautiful, its batteryfull