A husband was sitting on a sofa next to
his wife who was eating and typing on her
fone.
He heard his phone’s message tone
coming from the kitchen from where he
was charging it . He went to the kitchen
and read a message from his wife saying
“Please bring the salt on your way back.”

Girl: Bae u always think about football. I
cant remember the last time we had sex.
All because of this game
Boy: Sorry babe. Lets do it now
Girl: Sho. So wats your favourite position
Boy: Left wing.

I said NO..!! to a Girl asking me to be her boyfriend,
cause my mind is telling me
she just
wanna sleep with me and run away.

MAYBE I’M WRONG.. BUT IMAGINE! 👇

💁 One teacher stands in front of 20 kids👭👪😕 each one having different strengths, Needs, Gifts, Dreams, but being taught the same thing the same way for the damn 12 years😑 😕. I am not saying people shouldn’t go to school nor trying to discourage them against school✋ but just know that School and education are two different things👏 and all i wish for is an Education system that accommodate all of us and not this chalk and talk way😣 one size fits all way😡 I mean is it really necessary to move from one class to the next learning theory for the damn 12 years ?💁 ironically i did it😣
.
This education system makes it look like knowing English equate Intelligence 😡 Shouldn’t Education be about Expanding our Horizons and Visions ? 💁 I am not saying Education is not important but I am saying Opposed Education is Bullsh*t and Crap.
.
💁EDUCATION should be about Inspiring one’s mind, Understanding our motives and re-assess our aims😑and not only just about Regurgitating Facts from a book✋ or being a Graduatee from a highest institution and if one fails to do so their are referred as “Stupid” 😑🚮
.
👏👏Don’t judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree because it will spend its whole life thinking😭😭 “I am stupid”

The mother of a problem child went to see a psychiatrist, “You are far too upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquillisers regularly.” On her next visit the psychiatrist asked, “Have the tranquillisers calmed you down?” “Yes” the mother answered. “And how is your son now?” he asked.
“Who cares?” she replied.

Please i have a question, If i block someone on facebook
and i meet him in the street, will he see me?

I’ve stopped smoking weed after the day
I saw an Ant breastfeeding its babies….

never trust a guy who likes DJ Khaled
because there’s always another one.

Work hard until you get rich to the extent that
when you see a cockroach in your house,
Instead of killing it.You just move out&buy new house..

A letter of Apology for Being Absent at Work for The Whole Week..
.
Die Boss Am first off all ask you that you are how? And your family is how too?? My latter I right to sorry you for seeing me not there all 7 days. On Monday I work up with a marathon stomach. I tried to col you but didn’t touch the phone, in the afuthanunu I started taking out food with the mouth and it was wessy.
.
Thank you Boss.
Mogale M.P

I’m Selling A Secondhand Wife With two(2)Kids , Model 1988 , 1Day Guarantee..Price Negotiable Swap And Top Up.. . 88% Off (Hurry up!!!)is available now..
T&C’s Apply.

My wife got stung by a bee on the
forehead.
She’s at the doctor’s now,
her face all swollen and bruised,
she almost died.
Luckily I was close enough to hit the bee
with my shovel.

Slay Queen said:
If my body is the temple of God who am i
to limit the number of people who want to
enter?

Your boyfriend who failed mathematics is complaining
about you having stretch marks.
Tell him that those are the only marks he will get

Why do girls feel embarrassed when the
wig falls?.
Do you think we believed it was your hair

New disease detected when using fingers
for wiping your touch screen phones. It is
known as finger cancer . Everyone is being
encouraged to use a stone when wiping
touch screen phones instead of fingers to
prevent finger cancer. PREVENTION IS
BETTER THAN CURE , Stay healthy. Save a
friend and share