Slay Queen said:
If my body is the temple of God who am i
to limit the number of people who want to
enter?

You don’t know stress until you take your unemployed uncle
to a House Party then someone says “I cant find my phone

You are online i am online you know what does that mean??
We are sleeping alone no bae

Date a girl who drives a Picanto ,Spark ,Hyundai i10 etc, at ur own risk …
she’ll go & cheat on you 500km away with just R50 petrol

Ladies, imagine dating a guy that expects you to date him alone,
some guys are selfish

Dating a vegetarian gal is very hard.
Yesterday I bought her flowers and ate them.

Married 25 years, I took a look at my wife one day and said, “Honey, 25 years ago, we had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10 inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 25 year old blonde.
Now, we have a nice house, nice car, big bed and 60 inch plasma screen TV, but I’m sleeping with a 50 year old woman. It seems to me that you are not holding up your side of things.”
My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 25 year old blonde, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed.

– *Job Vacancy!!!*

Salary R18 000 per week, with free
– Accommodation,
-Meals and
-Company Car.

Limpopo Game Park need someone to:
-Bath Lions,
-Take care of the Tigers,
-Play with crocodiles &
– Feed snakes

No qualifications and experience required.
If interested please send your CV to *jonty@limpompogp.gov.za*

Let me know if u taking the job.. if u not don’t be jealous forward to others..
.
NB: *Please don’t ask what happened to the previous worker

Pastor Matome stood up and announced “today I have good news and bad news bazalwane!… The good news is that,we have enough money in this church to build a new,spacious modern church bazalwane!” Everyone in the church stood up,cheereing,singing and with applause! The pastor went on… “And the bad news is that, the money is still in your pockets!”

Witchcraft is when you see an inbox from your crush on Facebook…
And when you open it, it reads:
“You’re now connected on Messenger

You are 21 and already have 5 children?
My sister you deserve a VIP Gold SASSA card

If Facebook gets banned today
You will see some girls with their pictures
in their hands asking people,
“do you like my pics?”

The Perfect Man: – wakes up at 5 am everyday – exercises everyday – makes his own bed – cleans his room – works sincerely – does not touch alcohol – helps in the kitchen – does not indulge in night life – always punctual – prays daily – hits the bed at 9 pm sharp Such a perfect man can only be found in jail.

Teacher: Rainbow
Rainbow : Yes Sir
Teacher: what is 1 minus 1?
Rainbow : I don’t know Sir
Teacher : Okay when I put 1 fatcake in your hands and take it back how many remains?
Rainbow : Oil Sir.

Boy takes girl into bedroom, pulls his pants
down and says ” meet my little brother”,
girl pick up her bag, on her way out she
said,” call me when he’s grown up”…