Aniyeken kufihla ama Panty
enu ngoba nifuna kuhamba
nigqoke ama trank
ethu😂😂😂😂
mese nilibele ni post iythombe
niwagqokile

Dating a chick from Mamelodi
…. ai…
Whatsapp convo…
.
.
Boy: Hey Baby
Girl: Sho Captain Bae
Boy: How are you
Girl: Mxaaa ke monate Ledlozi, wena o grand mthakathi????
Boy: ke shapo, I wanted to tell you that you are beautiful
Girl: Shuuuu dankie bathong master bae, oraore kao charmer??? Oraore ke Mrs Canada yeh??? Tjoo wa thoma le gong feelisa funky, nkare nka bina bula masepao
Boy: Uhmmm I Love You Ne
Girl: Ah byanong o lover ke nna saaaan, ong shaya ding dong. Touchline ya Love fountain e tswere ke rena bjanong.
Boy: Got to go we will chat later ne
Girl: Sure Sure King Kunta, le nna ke nyako tsipa nyana boroko, same time same place ka bo 6 gona mo.. nna somar ke sona style se ka subella…… wololo!!!!!!

Nywe nywe nywe
I dnt hv a bae for Valentines day

syeke msoooon
mina angnababa nge Fathers day

Dear Coca-Cola
–
Ngithi anginazise ukuthi laba bantu enibasebenzisa kwizikhangisi zenu bayangichaza. Indlela abalibamba ngalo ibhodlela leCoke elibanda mpo, nendlela abalivula ngalo bese bephuza mlibe sengathi yikameli lasogwadule iSahara. Baphuza bankunkuluze ngebhodlela bephakamise ubuso kancane sakubheka elangeni, amehlo evaliwe kamnandi, begwinya lesi siphuzo imiphimbo yabo inyakaza kamnandi ngomgqigqo engihluleka ngisho ukuwuchaza. Bese bethatha ikhefu babuke ibhodlela ngamehlo anothando bemamatheka, basuke lapho belesule umjuluko ngesithupha.
–
Cha, nami-ke ngiyile esitolo ngafike ngacela iCoke ebandayo. Ngendlela ebengome ngayo, bengizimisele ukuyiphuza kube sengathi ngishutha isikhangisi seCoca-Cola lesi esengisichazile ngenhla. Bengizoyiphuza sengathi ngiphuza amanzi emva kokuzivocavoca kanzima ejimini.
–
Hhayi-ke, ngibe sengihlala phansi ebhentshini eduze kwesitolo ngase ngilivula ibhodlela lami. Ukube bekukhona ongibonayo, ubengafunga agomele ukuthi ngishutha isikhangisi sonyaka! Besingakawi naphansi isivalo, kodwa ngikutshela ukuthi ibhodlela bese ngilixhumile kowami umlomo. Ngizamile ukuyinkunkuluza (njengalabo bantu benu engibabona kwizikhangisi), kodwa ngasheshe ngaxhilwa amagwebu engingazi ukuthi aqhamukephi. Le Coke yenu, igcine seyiphuma ngamakhala kanti futhi enye ingene ngomgudu o-wrong yafika emaphashini. Ngikhwehlele kwaze kwacishe ukuphuma inhliziyo, nomphefumulo wami bese ngithi uyaphuma impela! Le system yami yokuphefumula ibihlangene nezimbila zithutha, inhliziyo yami bese isho ukuma nse. Amehlo ami kade esebomvu tebhu, izinyembezi zigeleza. Amakhala ami esemanzi amafinyila. Bese ngithi ngiyafa, umzimba wami ushukuma. Ubuso bami bonke, ihembe lami nebhulukwe emathangeni ngimanzi nte yile Coke. Amathe, amafinyila, nezinyembezi. Ukufa ngikubone ngamehlo, ithuna lami ngijike endleleni sengilibonile ngo-“see”. Leli kahle kahle yicala lokuzama ukubulala. Isikhubekiso soqobo empilweni yami.
–
Kuyayiwa kubo kaJesu ngiyanitshela! Liyothethwa leli cala. Ngethemba usathane ubhizi utheza izinkuni azonilothisa ngazo esihogweni ngoba liyonilahla leli cala.
–
Yimina owenu
(obengumthandi weCoca-Cola, but not anymore)

Me : Mbali I wanna take you out
Mbali : 😍 kuphi sthandwa sam and when?
Me : today, I’m taking you out of my life for good

Reply as Mbali

Zulu guys will hit on your girlfriend in your presence
and ask you if you have a problem
“Uyakhuluma mfwethu”?

Even if you went to Private School,
ok’salayo your matric certificate is written “Umalusi” not Shepherd