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When u Take a decision to Stay away
from a person ,
Take a decision also to not look to Him .

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There’s no Special reason for this message, I just wanna steal a single moment out of your busy life
and hope I can make you smile and say:
I Miss you…

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She asked me credit,I replied “seriously I don’t have Now I could help you”
She’s now asking if she can use her money,so I refund her back,am confused guys 🤣🤣😂😂🤔

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I asked her “what your favourite soapie?”…
She answered” it’s Protex”
-I forgot to faint

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Guys, could you please stop praying in English. 😂 😂 😂
.
Because there’s something happening. All the blessings are going to white people. 💖

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Daddy and Mommy are fighting in the living room, right before their little son.
Daddy : ” Oh!!! You Bitch! ”
Mommy: ” What?? You Bastard! ”
Son : ” Daddy, Mommy, what’s Bitch and Bastard?” At this moment, Daddy blushes. He quickly thinks up of something.
Daddy : ” It means Ladies and Gentlemen, Son. ”
Son : ” Oh I see! ”
2nd Scenario…
Little Son was watching a TV show about premarital sex, and there they mentioned the words ‘breasts’ and ‘penises’. Mommy was reading the papers.
Son : ” Mommy, what’s breasts and penises? ” At this moment, Mommy turned blue, and quickly thought of something to say.
Mommy: ” It means coats and hats, Son. ”
Son : ” Oh I see! ”
3rd Scenario…
Daddy was shaving his beard and Son passed by the toilet.
Suddenly, Daddy cut himself and screamed…
Daddy: ” OH SHIT!! ”
Son : ” Daddy, what’s shit? ” At this moment, Daddy’s eyes bulged, and quickly thought of something to say.
Daddy: ” It means shaving cream, Son. ”
Son : ” Oh I see! ”
4th Scenario…
Christmas is approaching, and Mommy was stuffing the turkey into the stove. The turkey just wouldn’t fit into the stove, so she said…
Mommy: ” Oh FUCK! ”
Son : ” Mommy, what’s fuck? ” At this moment, Mommy froze.
She quickly thought of something to say.
Mommy: ” It means stuffing, Son. ”
Son : ” Oh I see! ”
5th scenario…
It’s Christmas eve! Little Son exuberantly opened the door to let all his uncles, aunties, cousins and friends come into the house.
Proudly, he said…
Son : ” Welcome in, Bastards and Bitches! Please put all your breasts and penises at that corner of the house! My parents are busy at the moment. You see, Daddy is putting shit on his face upstairs and Mommy is fucking the turkey in the kitchen, but don’t worry, they’ll be out here in a minute!”

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ET just arrived home, and his mother said!

“Where on Earth have you been?

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I’m done blocking all the beautiful women
If you see this you know what it’s means

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When she says she’s a virgin then you tryna
be romantic by licking her tits
then boooom!!! Tswerrrr Milk

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why are people so afraid of snakes ? 🐍
.
.
the poor animal just wants to kill you that’s all.

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A newly married husband saved
his wife’s number on his mobile
as “MY LIFE”.
After 1 year of marriage he
changed the number to “MY
WIFE”. After 2 years of marriage
he
changed the number to “HOME”.
After 5 years of marriage he
changed the number to “HITLER”.
After 10 years of marriage he
changed the number to “WRONG
NUMBER”.
What name do you think he will
save the wife’s number with
after 15years…….?

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*To those ladies who always seem to be totally asleep but when you start removing their panty they raise waist a bit to help you remove it nicely, May God bless you!!!*

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1k airtime for anyone who can spell the sound made when a bottle of Coke is opened?…I’m serious

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When you are at the market and you saw your girlfriend twin sister and you go to her for a kiss and your girlfriend was rite beside you

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