Do not get jealous if you are single this Valentines. Always remember that chocolates can cause diabetes. Flowers will dry and lose their beauty. Balloons will deflate. Letters will go old. And most importantly, they will soon break up.
Nothing lasts forever

l went to police station to certify some copies, while I was there I saw a picture of Sylvester being posted on the notice board written “WANTED”
Me : officer, are you absolutely sure you want this man?
Cop: (in aghast) err of course. Yeah
Me : then why didn’t you arrest him when you took him that picture?
These cops are really stupid….

If your girlfriend comes home from school and
says “School was fun..” She is cheating! My
brother there is nothing fun about school! She is
dating the lecturer.

This Valentine’s Day is taking so long
.
I just wanna give her this R7 Cup so she can be out of my Business

A text from your crush can make you slap your Dad
on his head and say: “Yes boy”…

We must use English the way White people use our languages…
Is you hears me now?

A woman who finds beauty within herself
without comparing to other women
will always win in life.

Dear ladies…
Call him today and tell him you are coming and
sleep over his place….
then switch off your phone and sleep
Make that idiot to clean his room..

Morning

I saw a homeless man sleeping in a tyre,
so I did him a favor and punctured it.
He’s now sleeping in a flat

Stop it I liiike it

Ngrrrrrrrr ngrrrrrrr
Him::: Hello bbes
Her:::::hi Sam..I called to tell you that j can’t do this anymore..it’s getting hard by the day
Him::::can’t do what exactly?
Her:::I mean ,you don’t even have a car ..how will we go out ?
Him:::: hey hey hey ..hold up!…do YOU have a car ?
Her::no I don’t,But you’re a man and you’re the one who’s supposed to make a plan and have a car
Him:::ohhh I see ..so all the women that have cars,,are men ..is that what you’re telling me?
Her:::nooo no no
Him:::ohk ..does your father have a car ?
Her::::be he doesn’t Sam,, but that’s besides the point
Him::::point my foot,,,you have 5 brothers ,do they have cars ?
Her:::no bbe they don’t but…
Him:::But what huh?

Don’t come up with stories..find R10 and come see me tomorrow 9am ..I’ll be home

Her::::ok bbe I’m sorry ..see you tomorrow

Volume gents how far

*Gals* are busy complaining that when men have ***x* or *impregnate* them they run away.My question is:-
when u score a *goal* do u remain at the goal post or run *celebrating wildly*

wisdom will kill me

A Guy Sits In A Taxi And Sees His Wife Entering A Hotel With Another Man

He Ask The Driver: “Do You Want To Earn Rs 1000 Right Away?.”

The Driver Excitedly Says: “What Do I Have To Do?”

Man: “Bring My Wife By The Hair Out Of That Hotel, Here’s A Picture Of Her.”

After A While The Driver Is Seen Dragging A Woman By The Hair,

While Kicking And Beating Her And Puts Her In The Taxi.

The Husband Surprised And Says Says: “This Is Not My Wife”

The Driver Replied: “Nooooo, This Is Mine, Hold Her For Me.
I’m Going For Yours“

And you give your crush your homework to copy and
she gets a zero