A baby was born and minutes after he began to speak: I am going to live only 4 days, my Mother will die in 6 days and my Father will die in 15 days. 4 days later the boy died, after 6 days the Mother died. The Father was crazy coz the next one will be him. He sold everything and spent the whole money. 15 days later the neighbour died. Do not rush in solving problems.

I went to a chemist store and asked to talk to a male pharmacist.
The woman I spoke to said she was the only pharmacist and since she and her sister owned the store, there are no male employee.
She asked if she could help me.
I said that I really would have preferred to speak with a male pharmacist. She assured me that she was completely professional and whatever it was that I needed to discuss, I could be confident that she would treat me with a high level of professionalism.
I reluctantly agreed and began by saying, “As a shy man, this is tough for me to discuss, but here it goes. I get erections every day that last more than four hours. This condition causes me a lot of problems and severe embarrassment. I was wondering what you could give me for it.”
The pharmacist said, “Just a minute, I’ll talk to my sister.”
When she returned, she said, “We discussed it at length and this is the absolute best we can prescribe to you:
* 1/3rd ownership in the store.
* a company car
* A furnished house
* a king size bed and
* $15,000 a month as living expenses..” !!
What medication is this mara??

Public Service Announcement
If the relationship started this year 2018, then it is not eligible for Valentine’s gifts and spoiling……
It’s considered a Late Entry.
Boyfriends Association of Africa.

I Dont Care How Much I Spend On You But Remember :
When We Broke Up I Want My Money Back

Every Black Guy Have A Story To Tell About A Girl Lerato, Tebogo, Boitumelo And Mpho.

You Know Or Should I Tell You ?

That Awkward Moment Umlungu Start Talking To You
and Your ENGLISH Is nowhere to be Found.

If She Doesn’t Accept A Bible As A Present This Valentine;
Leave Her, She’s Evil!!!

Rich was a virgin😯 He knew nothing about sex. His parents married a girl for him😩
–
On the first night of the marriage, he entered the the bedroom only to see his wife completely naked. He was completely schocked😨😨 because he had never seen a naked woman in his Life😣
–
She asked: ” Do u know what I want?”😊☺
–
Rich said: “No”😐
–
She then laid on the bed and asked again: “Do u know what what I want?”😯
–
Rich said: “No!”😟
–
She then laid on bed and spread her body on the body and opened her legs wide open and then asked again: “Do U know what I want now…Its must be clear by now?”😉
–
Rich started laughing😂😂😂After laughing for about 4 minutes,
–
He said: “Yes now i get it!😂 You want to have to the whole bed and sleep alone”

Dad: Who do u like more dad or mom?😐
–
Rich: Both😉
–
Dad: Ok if i go to UK and your mom goes to America, where will u go?😕
–
Rich: America😉
–
Dad: That shows u love your mom more😓
–
Rich: No it shows I love America more than I love UK😃
–
Dad: ok, If i go to America and your mom goes to UK, where will u go?😑
–
Rich: UK😁
–
Dad: why😠😠😠
–
Rich:😂😂 I choose UK because I went to America before😉
–
Dad: when???😨
–
Rich: During the first question

I remember one time when I was in the supermarket😐
–
I saw a kid crying while throwing tantrums just because her mom didn’t buy her favourite chocolate🍫
–
Due to my clean heart..I bought the chocolate and ate it in front of the kid

Studio 88 rejected my job application,
so grand sharp I’m not qualified to follow
customers around the store?

Xhosa parents would want you to sit on their lap
even when you’re 18 years
just to avoid paying your fare in a taxi

IN THE TAXI..
DRIVER: IF UR SON IS 2 YEARS OLD THEN U SHOULD PAY FOR HIM.
ME: HE’S ONLY 24 MONTHS OLD.
DRIVER: OKAY..I THOUGHT HE’S 2 YEARS OLD.. SO DON’T PAY FOR HIM, HE IS STILL YOUNG.. VERY YOUNG.
ME: 😇

Mathematician: How to write 4 in between 5?
China: Is this a Joke?
Japan: Impossible!
America: The question’s wrong.
UK: Not found on Internet.
Zimbabwe: F(IV)E
This is the reason you find Zimbabweans
everywhere in the world in finance, business,
medicine, engineering….
anything to do with using your brain.
British: Can u Swim?
Zimbabwean: No
British: Then a Dog is Better den u because It
Swims.
Zimbabwean: Can u Swim?
British: Yes!
Zimbabwean: Then What’s the Difference
between u & Dog…
British Shocked, Zimbo Rocks!

A thief entered the house in the mid- afternoon..
he tied up the woman and showing knife point asked the man to hand over all the jewelleries and money…
Man started sobbing and said Bhai u take anything u want but please untie her rope….There will a big problem here.
Thief: What problem?
Man : she is my neighbors wife.. Mine will arrive shortly.

Today’s kids are so spoilt that they don’t know that in our days you could be beaten for any of the followingv reasons:

1. Crying after being beaten.
2. Not crying after being beaten
3. Crying without being beaten
4. Standing while the elders are seated
5. Sitting while the elders stand
6. Walking around aimlessly where the elders are seated.
7. Replying back to an elder
8. Not replying back to an elder
9. Spending too much time without being beaten.
10. Singing after being admonished
11. Not greeting visitors
12. Eating food prepared for the visitors.
13. Crying to go with the visitors when the visitors are leaving.
14. Refusing to eat.
15. Coming back home after sunset
16. Eating at the neighbour’s home
17. Generally being moody.
18. Generally being too excited.
19. Fighting with your age mate and losing.
20. Fighting with your age mate and winning.
21. Eating too slowly
22. Eating too quickly
23. Eating too much
24. Eating too little
25. Sleeping while the elders had already woken up
26. Looking at the visitors while they are eating
27.Stumbling and falling when walking…