I’m sorry to say this but Girls are slowly replacing swimming pools

Girls did you know that these boys when they inbox 📥 us it took a long process? They go through our Profile pics to check if we’re approachable, to check if we’re at the same level. After that they go to inbox and type📼 “Hi” n they stop for 2mins meditating🙀 if they can post it or not, they delete❌it and log out thinking if they can come up with good approach. After some few hours⌚ they consolidate✊ themselves n say now am going to talk to her, they log in n come straight to your acc n look at your pic for 3mins thinking, they cancel it and they go to check their notifications 🔔, they leave their Facebook online n do something for 15mins, they come back n notice that you’re online they log out again coz they think they’re being watched. They log in n check their notifications 🔔again for 30sec n they come back to ur acc n notice that you’ve logged out, they boost their confidence n they type “Hello Beautiful” n they stop for 3mins, they delete it instantly❌😏 n type “Hi” finally, and they log out quickly after sending it n Spend five hours without logging in coz they’re afraid you might have ignore them. At 19:30 they go to bath 🛀 after that they go straight to their beds n login in to Facebook, they’re now happy coz there’s two messages, they ignore it for 5mins n go straight to their notifications liking, commenting posts of their friends, after some 10mins they go straight to inbox n they found that you didn’t reply, they start to blame themselves maybe it’s because am ugly this n that so on and on they faint 💂😂😁. Guys am I wrong? 😊 Ladies keep it up we have dignity n we’re so precious. 👏

My Landlord is a good man, I came back and see 2 big padlocks on my door. I know it’s because of insecurity in my area

Most guys are single because they refuse to answer this question;
“How did you get my number?”

When you are in love,
Wonders happen.
But once you get married,
You wonder, what happened.

A sick woman was lying on her sick bed with
her husband by her side,😭
She turns to the husband and said
WIFE : Honey, I have a confession to make….😢
HUSBAND : Save your strength my dear!☺😊
WIFE : [Cuts in] Nooo,😭 I want to say it so that
when I die my spirit will be at rest😣.I have been
stealing your money and giving it to my boyfriend😢,
You’re not the father of our son Junior, I was the one who stole
your gold wrist watch and hide it in your
sister’s bag so that you’ll drive her away😩..
Please forgive me😞
HUSBAND : I know all this, that’s why I poisoned you.😊
Keep calm Let the poison work…. s

Refusing to send Transport Money has made some guys👮 to lose their future wives👧. My brother, Be wise and send that money now

“No Woman Can Control Me, No Woman Can Control Me”; “No woman can tell me what to do”
~•~^~•~
But Once She Says: “Go Lock the Door First” You Fly Like A Bird..!

[Dear Ladies]
Have you ever made a guy drop you off at another guy’s place?

Respect your partner’s phone so that the days of your relationship will be increased..!

m i the only one who has a whole list of things to download, but as soon as I’m connected to WIFI i forget everything..

Stop saying: “They didn’t want me in high school, now they want me”. Did you see how you looked? Stop being unreasonable and unfair..! ☝

Ask your girlfriend to come and visit you she will demand for transport money, but let someone tell her that you are with another girl… My brother she can even hire a private jet

*SEKE MAN IMPREGNATED 4 MEMBERS OF THE SAME FAMILY.*
A man shocked the residents of Seke when it was discovered that he impregnated 4 members of the same family.
Melinda Mukuyu, a married woman, her young sister and two of her daughters are said to have been impregnated by a local business man a Mr Foster Chiwanda.
There was drama in the area when the husband to Mukuyu requested to know who was responsible for her pregnancy because he had been away on fishing for some few months. This is when it was discovered that Mr Chiwanda had hit the jackpot and the sister also came up and said she was equally pregnant for the same man.
Then the daughters also confessed to seeing the said man and they too were pregnant. This got out of hand especially that one of the girls was just 15 years old. The husband then dragged the wife and the daughters to Mr Chiwanda who upon seeing them, he decided to leave the place but it was a bit too late for him because a lot of people had joined got hold of him.
As a first slap landed on him, he knew he had to save himself and he broke loose and ran for his dear life. One eye witness said he heard Mr Chiwanda saying ” ! ” (We are the only remaining real men, these others are just examples of men.)
Residents chased him behind with whatever weapon they could get hold of. As one man was about to catch him, he jumped and to the amusement of everyone, he started flying.
It was at this moment when my brother woke me up and said go and bath will be late for work..
Will tell you Wat happened next when I sleep tonight and have a continued dream.

Photographer: Principal my photos will cost R10 each child
Principal: Teachers please tell the students that photos are R20
Teachers: Kids 2morrow bring R30 for photos
Child: Mom the teacher said we must bring R50 for the photos
Mom:Daddy our kid needs R100 for the school photos…
And you expect corruption to end.!!!!

Women: Communication is key!👌
Men: What’s wrong babe?🤔
Women: Nothing GOODNIGHT!