Weekend l attended a birthday party- with a gathering of abt 30 people!! I sat on the front row seat….then a lady started sharing food. She started from the back and unfortunately, it didn’t reach us at the front. When her friends started sharing drinks, they started from the front but unfortunately I had already changed my seat to the back….!!! Again the drink didn’t reach me. I was so furious and I stood up to take my leave but then I saw three ladies each with a big bowl. This time, I tried to be wise by sitting at the middle. . To my uttermost surprise, one of the ladies started sharing from the front…and the second lady started distributing from the back. It was turkey meat…. When it got to the middle where I was seated it got finished again. Feeling so frustrated, I bent my head, not looking at any face…but then the third lady tapped me and stretched her bowl that I should pick somethng frm inside.. I stretched my hand… Guess what was in the bowl..?
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.
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Toothpicks!!!

A Zulu man went to an electronic
shop.
He asked the shopkeeper; What is the
price of this television?
The shopkeeper replied; We don’t sell
our products to the Zulu people .
Zulu man again came the next day after
cutting his beard.
He asked; What is the price of this
television?
The shopkeeper replied; We don’t sell
our products to the Zulu people.
The next day Zulu man came with a
different face and asked; What is the
price of this television?
The shopkeeper replied; We don’t sell
our products to the Zulu people
Zulu man got irritated and asked the
shopkeeper; How do you recognise
me everytime?
The shopkeeper replied; Because this
is not a television. It is a microwave
oven.
One word for Zulu man

Girls Always Win Everything On Earth 😢!

E.G Give Her Her Money “correct”✔

But “Give Him Him Money” Is Wrong

A boy asked a girl in a library, “Do you mind if I sit beside you”?
The girl Answered with a loud angry voice; “I don’t want to spend the night with you!!
Everyone in the library started staring at the boy and he was embarrassed.
After minutes the girl walked quietly to the guy’s table and said to him I study psychology and I know what man is thinking, I guess you felt embarrassed ,right?
The guy responded with a loud voice :$300 for one night That’s too much!! and all the people in the library looked at the girl in shock and the guy whispered in her ears, “I study law and I know how to make someone guilty

So I was in a taxi and there’s a
muscular, weird looking guy in
the back. His phone rang and
he answered, “Sure thing boss,
I’m in a taxi with him and I’ll
shoot him when he gets off
“…
No one got off the taxi, we’re
now at the Taxi driver’s home

The chances of a lady getting a job in
Africa do not depend on her academic
qualifications or working experience……
they depend on size and shape of her
buttocks

Girl:I didn’t catch your name.
Me:I didn’t throw it

A guy was on a bus and his phone rang. It
was his wife calling he wanted to show off
so he decided to put his phone on
loudspeaker and answered..Him: Hi
sweetheart miss me already baby?.Wife:
Your Shitt! Miss who?
You ate the baby’s youghurt and ran away
you pig

Rainbow came back home & found his wife
crying
Rainbow:What’s wrong dear?
Wife:Your son called me a bitch
Rainbow:Mxm I’m gonna kill that son of a
bitch

April 1 is named FOOL’S DAY, after Clive
April. He was born on 1st April 1579 . He
did 105 businesses in his lifetime. He lost
all his father’s assets and so everyone
started calling him father of the fools.
At 19, he married a 61-year-old woman
who divorced him after a year because of
his foolishness.
He used to read all kinds of fake stories like
you are doing now.

An inspirational speaker said: “The best
days of my life were The Days I spent In The
Arms Of another man’s wife”
.
The audience was
shocked
.
Then he quickly added:
“She was my mother”.
.
A big round of applause
and laughter followed.
.
.
An adventurous man in the audience later
decided to try this at home.
.
After dinner he told
his wife: “You know, the best days of my life
were the days I spent In The Arms of
another man’s wife”.
.
But he couldn’t quickly recall the follow-up
line.
.
By the time he regained
consciousness, he was on a hospital bed
recovering from burns of boiling water!

just Imagine being a lesbian you wait the whole week
for your partner to finish her periods
When she finish you start yours

Q: What is the most erotic number?
A: 2110593!
Q: Why?
A: When 2 are 1 and dont pay at10tion,
theyll know within 5 weeks whether or not, after 9 months, theyll be 3.

I hate it when i tell people that i will be back in 10minutes
and they keep calling me every 20 minutes…

Bae: Really?,U Just slept With My Friend?

Me: No Babe… We Did It While STANDING.

Imagine fighting with another woman over your
“Man”then boom there are five more to go and
thats when you will realise that
you have a tournament..
Stay strong my sister..