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Monday 11:00am at school
Teacher : Good morning my children
Class : Morning ma’am
Teacher : Today we talking about colours, give me all the colours that you know.
Mmusi Maimane : Brown
Ramaphosa : Light Brown.
Gwede Mantashe : Dark Brown
Teacher : Mhmmm very good, continue
Zuma : Chris Brown
Teacher : Mxm, Malema help Zuma please
Julias Malema : Loaf Brown
Teacher : what??Hellen please help these two idiots…
Hellen Zille : Brown Dash
Teacher : Mangosuthu help these Idiots
Mangosuthu Buthelezi : Ellis Brown
Teacher : fotsek!!!

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Angeke ube innocent njengomuntu ozobeka isitsha uma uwasha izitsha

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THEKENI YAFANA NE MEETING😒☝
NGEKE UYIBAMBE WEDWA

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UMsaphozi emngcwabeni!!!
Msaphozi: Sanibonani nonke etendeni. Ngiyabonga ukuthola leli thuba lokukhuluma ngomzala.
Umzala ushona nje besegulile sonke simubonile. Futhi umzala mina ngangithi uzofa ngo 2010 ngoba nalapho wake wagula wabangwa nezibi kodwa wavuka waphinda waqhubeka lapho ayegcine khona nokuqoma, waqoma okusengathi akakaze agule nhlobo.
OMagwaza nomshumayeli uXulu bangixaka sebejola naye umzala ekubeni yibo abebumuthandazela esebangwa nezibi ngoba ayi nani madoda nikholwa ngokuzibonela ukuthi kunani phansi kwesiketi.
Ngageza izandla uma sengizwa kuthiwa nawe Mfundisi usujola nomzala kodwa ngeke sizixoxe lezo ngoba sisemngcwabeni kanti nomfazi wakho ukhona lapha, kodwa ngadumala ngoba phela wena Mfundisi ubumazi kahle umzala ingane kaAnti ukuthi ayilungile kodwa ke ngeke ngikujaje Mfundisi ngoba nawe uwumuntu njengabo obab’ Mkhize laba laphaya emuva (ekhomba uMkhize) obeze agaklaze umfazi wakhe efuna ukuza kuye umzala lona.
UmkaMkhize njengoba elapha nje ufuna ukuzibonela ukuthi umzala wami ufe ngempela yini.
Kona ke engingakusho ngomzala wami ubewathanda amadoda ikakhulukazi ashadile futhi nawo emthanda kodwa into enhle uze wafa umzala engahlukanisanga muntu nenkosikazi yakhe.
La endaweni ngithi mabili mathathu amadoda emizi yawo angajolanga nomzala. Ngithukile nje uZungu uma esesikhokhisa layikhaya ngokuqasha itende lakhe kodwa ke ngabuye ngabona ukuthi unkosikakazi wakhe ubengazi ukuthi ubejola nomzala ngalokho siyamxolela uZungu siwumndeni ngaleso senzo sakhe.
Mzala wami uhambe kahle uma ufika ezulwini ungasiphoxi uqomane namasulumane, amaJuda, oPilatu noSamusoni beno Nebukhedinesari.
Uziphathe kahle mzala ezulwini uhlale ngentombi yize ingasekho nje kodwa uzame mzala wami… Uhambe kahle mntaka Anti sohleze sibabaza imigilingwane yakho!!
Ngiyabonga ngisaya ngale exhibeni sengikhulume ngaze ngoma.

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Teacher: “Who was the mother of Moses from the bible?”
Student: “Nguna-Mozeh”
😂😂😂😂💦

Ngahle ngaphuma e classin

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Zulu girls be like:
“i might be stupid kodwa angisona isilima”
Hebanaa

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Badliwe abantwana babantu with this question!!!!

So ungibona nini😂😂😂???

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Othandekayo Sherpard. yimi ugogo
wakho una Ame ngifuna ukubonga
isifiso owasenzayo sokungidingela
umfana uJJ wokungincedisa
imisebenzi ekhaya.Udubo lwami
ngolokuthi uJJ yisilima
samagalathiya ,buya uzomthatha
umbisele lapho owamthatha
khona.Ngamthuma koDube
ukuyathatha idonki wabuya
elithwele emahlombe ngamtshela
ukuthi ngani uthethe
intambo walibopha labuya
lizihambela yena elidonsa,ngeviki
eyalandelayo ngathi ayethatha
umlenze wenkomo koMaphosa
wabuya lawo ewubophe ngentambo
ewudonsa
enhlabathini,inyama yonke
yagcwala inhlabathi ngathi kuye
ngani ubeyifake ekhanda..Ngamth
uma imajarina esitolo
wabuya eyifake ekhanda khonapho
ilanga litshisa bhe
wancibilika wagelezela ebusweni
ngathi ngani ubefake
esikwameni.Ngasengimthuma
uchago lwenkomo koMagamula
wabethatha uchago lonke ethela
esikhwameni.Ngamthuma
futhi ukuthi ayethenga i2kg
yetshukela waphenduka
engathenganga esithi kulama 1kg
kuphela ,ngathi ngabe
uthenge ama1kg angu2,ngamthuma
njalo ukuthi
angithengele amathenisi ami uSIZE6
wabuya esithi uwaswele
wasethenga oSIZE3 ababili……..
……………ha mzukulu buya
uthathe umuntu wakho kusasa
lokhu!!
Yimi ugogo wakho una Ame!!

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Intombi iyafana nemali
Uyakwaz ukut awnayo
Ube unayo

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Ungene kwiRelationship uthi uzimisele
ngokuhlala, uthi uyafika iy’tulo azikho

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Uyaphi eRoomin yakhe ungekho ready for
, uyomosha ama Doritos ne Slap somunye umntwana

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When You Dating An Ugly Person Uthi Umfaka Ku WhatsApp📱Status Uzwe Umuntu Athi “Looool😂😂😂😂Please SEND”

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Ubani ofuna siSign(e) nayo iContract
.
Contract YoCansi
Lokhu kuqinisekisa ukuthi mina (Igama),___________ njengoba ngisayinile ngezansi (Ozobhejwa) ngiyazibophezela futhi ngiyathanda ukubhejwa wu (Igama)___________________________________(Imbebhi).
Ngiyaqinisekisa ukuthi iminyaka yami yobudala iyangivumela ukuthi sengingadliwa, ngijabulele ubumnandi bokuba nesinene engasiphiwa nguMdali. Nginesiqiniseko sokuthi angidakiwe wutshwala futhi akangidakiswanga ngasidakamizwa ngiyimina ngiphelele nomqondo wami, futhi sengiqhanyelwe ngiyafa, ngilangazelele lolu holokoqo lo mthondo ozongena ezibilini zenkomo yami. Ngiyaqinisekisa nokuthi umzuliswano ngamunye ngowemvume yami. Ngiyasho bakithi ukuthi imbebhi yami * ayisebenzisanga sihluku * ayingisabisanga ngalutho * ayingiphoqanga, * futhi ayingithembisanga lutho ukuze ngiyibhebhise. Ukwengenza nje, imbebhi yami * angiyesabi nakancane * futhi angilindele mshado kuyona. Angikucacise ukuthi; sizobhebhana nje angimazi noma ushadile yini futhi anginandaba. Njengoba ezongibhebha nje angihuqi buthongo futhi angidakiwe kodwa ngibhejwa ngoba ngithanda futhi angangibhebha kangangokuthanda kwakhe, kuphela nje ngemvume yami. Uma engibhebhe ngeneliseka njengoba ngilindele, ngiyamvumela kusemanje ukuthi aphinde angihlabe nginabe ngenele ngesikhathi esoshiwo nguyena futhi nami uma ngifisa. Ukwengeza nje angisoze ngaba wufakazi kumbe ngime ebhokisini lenkantolo ngethule ubufakazi obucindezela yena, kumbe ngifake icala lokuthi ungidle ngenkani ngingafuni, noma ngabe ngiyamitha, ngithola isifo socansi, kumbe ngibona ukuthi wephule amalungelo athize ami, noma ngabe yini esizoyenza manje ngiyayithanda futhi ngiyayemukela. Ngisayine nginqunu ngaphambi kokugxumela embhedeni sikususe lokho_________ (Usuku)_____________(Inyanga nonyaka). Sayina Mbhejwa: ______________________ Usuku lokuzalwa : __________________ Usuku obhejwe ngalo:____________________

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