The money I pay in school is called school fees.
The money that I pay in the Church is called Offering and Tithes.
The money I pay in the bank is called Bank charge.
…
Up till now, I still don’t know what to call the money that I give to ladies.
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Every time i feel like I’m ugly i just go and look at a few profile pics of participants in this group then i feel better about myself. You guys give me hope.
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If they can’t do their part,
they don’t deserve your heart.
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There is something wrong with my cell phone.
It does not have your number in it
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When you miss someone,
you keep checking their profile.
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The way I’m so drunk
_
_
I used a calculator to post
this…
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When She’s Mad…😠
.
Guy: Babe!
Her: Don’t Call Me That!😏✋
Guy: Lebo!
Her: So I’m Lebo now? Oh wow!
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Don’t make me your option,
when I have made you my priority
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Hi – Im the girl of your dreams.
Someone said you were looking for me.
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Just because that lipstick is expensive it doesn’t mean it’s looks good on your lips,
some lips just need vaseline
and that Green Zam-buk
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A boy Known as “TC” went to the police station 🚔🚓🚨 to report his stolen bicycle🚲.
TC : My bicycle🚲 is lost
Police : When did you notice it?
TC : This morning
Police : so do you suspect anyone?
TC : Yes,mom and dad
Police : Why you say that?
TC : Because last night i just heard my mom saying “make it stand well so that i can seat on it very well,then i i heard my dad saying “climb faster before it falls an mom said “push it very slowly an please don’t hurt me.
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am the only one
is deeply in love but still single
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If ii cut off ur left arm,
ur right arm will be left
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THINGS ARE NOT ALWAYS WHAT THEY SEEM
A guy met one of his school mates several years after school
and he could not believe his eyes; his friend was driving one
of the latest sleek Mercedes Benz cars. He went home
feeling awful and very disappointed in himself. He thought he
was a failure.
🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽🌽
What he didn’t know was that his friend was a driver and had
been sent on an errand with his boss’s car!
🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽🌽
Rosemary nagged her husband always for not being
romantic. She accused him of not getting down to open the
car door for her as her friend Jane’s husband did when he
dropped her off at work.
🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽🌽
What Rosemary didn’t know was that Jane’s husband’s car
had a faulty door that could only be opened from the outside!
🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽🌽
Sampson’s wife went to visit one of her long time friends and
was very troubled for seeing the 3 lovely children of her
friend playing around. Her problem was that she had only one
child and have been struggling to conceive for the past five
years.
🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽🌽
What she didn’t know was that one of those children who
was the biological child of her friend had sickle cell and had
just a year to live; the other two are adopted!
🌽Life does not have a universal measuring tool; so create
yours and use it.
🌽Looking at people and comparing yourself with them will
not make you better but bitter.
🌽If you knew the sort of load the camel carries, you
wouldn’t ask why it takes those gentle strides.
🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽🌽
So be thankful to God for what you have and enjoy it. You
never know, someone may earnestly be praying for what you
don’t appreciate but take for granted.
🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽🌽
🌽🌽🌽🌽
GOD BLESS US WITH MUCH MORE AS WE APPRECIATE
WHAT WE ALREADY HAVE
I love you all family.
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KINDS OF PEOPLE ON FACEBOOK:
1. THE UNHEALTHY: They always have
stomach ache, headache, back ache etc.
Facebook is not a clinic.
2. THE LIARS: Lie about their age, marital
status and use ridiculous names like Baby,
Awesome ,Angel, Dude, Miss pee, boo ,
Man, blah blah!!
3. THE WITCHES: They always like updating
about death, bad news and sickness.
4. THE TRAVELERS: Today in America,
tomorrow heading to Italy or South Africa,
next All over The country! Are you a
minister for tourism?
5. WEATHER FORECASTERS: They update
mostly when it is raining, cold or hot e.g
‘I’m freezing’ etc
6. PREACHERS: This are mostly single men/
ladies who are looking for a spouse. They
act holy and write Bible verses only on
Sundays and Fridays or on festival day.
7. THE CONFUSED: They are married today,
engaged tomorrow, next day in an open
relationship, in a complicated relationship,
single or divorced.
8. THE FIGHTERS: All they do is to seek
trouble on people’s post, they comment
awkwardly in order to start a fight.
9. THE (I Too Know): They will always
complain that u’re always online, they will
say; are you jobless? Sometimes u can’t sop
wondering what they are doing online
themselves. Seriously, man get a life and
stop face booking.
10. THE DESPERATE. They are always
posting pictures of them in different cars
claiming car owners and always updating
themselves in different hotels and
eateries…damn…are they car dealer or
Hotel room attendant?
11. THE PEACE MAKERS: These people are
very friendly and they appreciate peoples
effort, they say thank you if they read your
post and smile.
Note: These people are usually very rare to
find.
12. AND FINALLY THE HATERS: They will
never like or comment on your posts except when they have something negative to say about you or your posts. Or u put up an update which says you are “sad, heartbroken or in Pain”.
I mean they wont even Like this post..
e.g that’s a stolen post WTF, did i say i own it?
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My Plan is to Love Her So Good To A Point
Where she Struggles To Remember
Any Nigga Who Once Been In Her Life Before Me.
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