Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerburg, Donald Trump, myself*
and other *billionares* would like to
wish u a happy festive season
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That moment when u visit your
rich relative in the surburbs,
then his wife serves u 2 slices of
bread,1 egg and a small cup of tea.Then the
children come to u and ask “uncle,so u will
finish all these?”
.
In yo heart u will be like “Fotseki,i finish the
whole loaf alone,now whats this?”🍞
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I have returned my wife back to her home village……………
Last week on Saturday i bought KFC bucket and she boiled the chicken and put onions and tomatoes and i kept quiet..
Then on Monday i brought Pizza and boom she put margarine/ butter and peanut butter and she gave me for breakfast….
yesterday i forgot my phone at home and i found 93 missed calls from her and i asked her why did she phone me.
She said she was trying to tell me that i forgot the phone at home….so i sent her back home..
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If you want someone to listen to you,
start the conversation with
“I shouldn’t be telling you this but..”
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What’s worse than a heartbreak?
“ever cheated on a exam and still failed?
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I thought I knew English until I heard my neighbour explaining the difference between Email and Gmail,
(1)Email – the mails which are sent using Electricity
(2)Gmail -the mails which are sent using a Generator
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!!!!!!GONE TOO SOON!!!!!!
It is my great sympathy to inform u about the death of our beloved friend and well known gentleman called Mr. 2017 he survived with 12 wives(months), 52 children(weeks) and 365 grand children (days). funeral will take place on Sunday 31st December at 23 59 hrs for more information contact pastor January on phone number 01 01 2018 have a wonderful festive SEASON……….
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RANDOM:
Did you know?…
If you send to a girl cash for transport to come over but she decides not come over and does not refund that money…
You can refer to Section 492(i) of the Criminal Procedure Act & file a case of theft under false pretence, & she can be jailed for up to 7 years?
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What is love?
Love is when your husband catches you with another man naked and still say “honey, dress up, let’s go home
* What is death ?*
Death is when you follow him
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Drugs For Husbands!
💉💊🔬
This really cracked my ribs …..
New drugs for men created by women scientists are waiting for NAFDAC approval…😔
ANIVERSIA: the drugs Triggers memories for birthdays and anniversaries…
SLIMOXIL: this one widens male cornea making wives always appear slim…
SPORTOBLIND X: Reacts with optic nerve to prevent men from recognizing the word “Sports” on DSTV…
WORKOCETAMOL: Generates an insatiable desire in men to do household chores…
SHOPHOFOBEX: Makes men eager to take wives for shopping every week and wait patiently…
FLIRTONATE-N: It reduces vision whenever a pretty woman passes by.
VERYTASTYMYCIN : Induces husbands to always praise wife’s cooking….no matter how it tastes…!
Don’t just laugh alone but share with our femalefolks who need to laugh and men who must be aware before they fall victim
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Hello guys
Anyone single here?
If yes please whatsapp me your details.
Am selling a single bed.
Thank you
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An airline introduced a special package for businessmen. Buy your ticket; get your wife’s ticket free. After a great success, the airline sent letters to all the wives asking how was the trip.
All of them gave the same reply, “WHICH TRIP?”
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Nyaa and Ngena ,2 children were sitting outside a clinic.
Ngena happened to be crying very loud,
“Why are you crying?” Nyaa asked.
“I came for a blood test.” sobbed Ngena
“So are you afraid?” asked Nya.
Ngena then replied,”For the blood test they have to cut my finger.”
As Nya heard this,he immidiately began crying profusely.
Astonished, Ngena asked Nyaa,”Why are you crying now?”
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Nya then replied,”I came for a urine test.”
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Xolie was taking a nap on
Valentine’s Day afternoon.
After she awoke, she told her husband, (Nyaa)
“I just dreamed that you gave me a gorgeous and expensive diamond necklace for
Valentine’s Day! What do you think it
means?”
“You’ll know tonight,”
Nyaa said.
That evening, Nyaa came home with a
small package for her. Thrilled, she
opened it and found a book titled “The Meaning of Dreams.”
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Nyaa entered into a pub 4 drinks with other friends.
After 2 hours of drinking , the bill comes and it reads :
Mr Nyaa : $4,50
Ms Ngena : $4,50
Ms Xolie: 4,50
TOTAL : 1,350
when Nyaa saw the bill he turns to the barman and raises his voice ;
Haaaaa!! I will only pay for Ngena and Xolie as for Total , he will pay for himself coz we did not invite him after all he owns a lot of garages country wide
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The reason why we don’t trust people :
-We don’t know them.
-We know them.
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