Ey Lona I Saw Two Lesbians At Pic’nPay
Buying A Cucumber And I Smiled

So I just met this beautiful girl in the taxi
carrying a laptop…so..I had to make a plan yabo
yokumngena
.
Me:”hello there beautiful… I see you’re busy on
your laptop…what are you doing vele?
.
Her:”oh I’m just busy making a research about
men from different ethnic groups who are good
in bed..manje so far I’ve researched four groups
.
Me”ohh..okay so what have you found out so
far?
.
Her”I found out that Basotho men last longer in
bed…and Zulu’s are good at serenating and
flirting with a woman..the Boers are good kissers
and that Venda’s have big amazing dick….eish
sorry..here I am busy talking too much.. Konje
you said your name was again? .
.
Me:”ohh..well my name is Brian Shaka Van
wyk…but my friends call me Azwindini

If your boyfriend is on Facebook
and half of his female friends are
hotter than you, my prayers are
with you my child,
be strong.

Relationship stress will make you
do window shopping with a trolley

A very sick woman on her sick bed said to her husband: ‘Honey if I die, how long would it take you before you marry a another wife…?!
The man replied….’ till your grave becomes dry my love

Then she said: Are you promising me this…?!
“Of course darling… I promise you “.
And after her demise, her husband began to visit her grave everyday for a period of one year.
*And the grave was always wet, it never became dry…!!!”

And a day came when he visited the graveyard in the evening, he found her brother in the graveyard.

“He then asked him: “Jason what are you doing here…?”

He replied :.. I’m fulfilling the wish of my only sister. She said I should please come here everyday to wet her grave”

WOMEN….

I tell you honestly … they rock…. alive or dead

My mom thinks my friends are bad influences.
but honestly, I am usually the one coming up with the ideas.

Remember your salary must last you the
whole three months of January

When ever the church wifi
is off
I come back home
early✊😂

Dear Grade 12 of 2017 you all have the rights to remain silence this week coz everything that you say could be used against you on the day of results

Don’t be too excited Today !!!!!

Everything still the same wife ,job,position work.
only calendar will change !!!!

I went to the hospital today to see Mr 2017.He’s not looking good I don’t know whether we gonna see him tomorrow

Q : what you will do if you lazy and
someone tell you to go to the market?
A : i will visit the online market

Madness is when u know its cold…
But u take out all ur clothes just 2 wear a condom

33 000 people diagonised with the deadly January disease , the number is expected to shoot up in the coming month

Symptoms of January disease –

1: unending fights between husband and wife / boyfriend and girlfriend
2: loss of weight
3: eating vegetables , bread and achaar, cabbage chicken feet and heads, everyday
4 : loss of craving for beer
5 : staying at home shuning your friends and telling them that you no longer drink beer
6 : blocking your smallhouse’s phone number
7 : stress
8 : being unable to count the number of days in January , counting 60 days instead of 31
9 : no sex with your patner
10 : borrowing groceries from the shops and tuckshops
11 : leaving your whatsapp group and selling your phone

If you have any of these symptoms my advise to you is next year spend the way you did this year
You spend a lot of money uyanya.