When a girl is so good in bed but very lazy to do house chores and your relatives start complaining about her.
“I be like ‘You guys don’t know her very well”

I feel sorry for people who don’t have dogs.
I hear that they have to pick up food from the floor
when they have dropped it.

At church service⛪
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Pastor called Rich infront of congregation for a prophecy🎤
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Pastor: Can I prophecy?😶
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Rich: Yes Man Of God😮
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Pastor: Do I know u? Have we Met before?😐
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Rich: Not at all Pastor! And its my first time coming here☺
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Pastor: You have blankets at home😕
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Rich: Yes that’s true pastor😊
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Pastor: you eat food and drink water for almost everyday😕
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Rich: Yes papa! Go deeper papa go deeper!
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Pastor: And your mother is a woman

Richman : Sir, there’s a Taxi strike and I’m afraid I won’t make it to Work Today.

Boss : Man you’ve mentioned Running as your Hobby in your CV…See you at Work

One day I wish to wake up in the morning,
turn on the news and hear
“Monday is cancelled, go back to sleep”

I saw two cockroaches mating(having s*x). I wanted to spray insecticide”Baygon” and I thought twice,maybe he has been chasing her for years,and she has been eating his money without allowing him get”down there”,I’m a human and I have a good heart,so I let him enjoy……… But as I was leaving, I got a second thought. What if he’s raping her?…….. I’m confused. What do I do?

I thought I’ve seen it all at varsity till a 1st year went to a lecturer n said “can I pls go to toilet”

Last Night i was with Trevor Noah, we were going to perform at a sell out crowd in New York. When we were about to start with the jokes…….behold…….my mother woke me up “Ronnie wake up and get ready for school”.
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I’m still not talking to her

Relationships Are Not For Everyone,
Some Of You Should Just Stick To Alcohol

You Can Talk As Much Bad As You Can About The Beautiful Girls Slaying On Facebook But Don’t Forget🙋 We Know That Deep Down You Want To Be A Slay Queen Too.
But Your Looks Are Beyond Your Control. Sorry My Sister

A Man Looses His Wife To Death And Remarries A Year After, He Did The Rught Thing, He’s Being Praised And Congratulated For Moving On, After All Life Is For The Living. A Woman Looses Her Husband To Death And Remarries After 4yrs, “aaah! So Early? Are U Sure She Wasn’t Sleeping With That Man Even When Her Husband Was alive? That Was Why She Killed Her Husband

I am Rico, I was still young when grandpa’s ikikwento is the sinking of the Titanic. It’s a true story because it’s really true. Grandfather is one of the passengers and with her grandma. Grandpa really felt like there is something wrong with the ship. How many times he told grandma to sink the ship but grandma doesn’t want to believe. So he did grandpa he cried. ” drown the ship! Let’s wear a gating life jacket!” grandpa’s cry. But no one minded him. Grandma scolded him because he said he was crazy. I didn’t drown it. So Grandpa did he go to the front and there he shouted a shout. ” the ship is supposed to drown! Are you stupid?” grandpa’s cry. But it’s still the same, he still ignored people until the grandfather was discharged in the cinema.

My Problem is Not That Girls Fall During Deliverance,
But The Way They Fall And Still Remember To
Close Their Legs Damn Shit Kills Me

Tips For Loosing Weight..! Slowly Turn Your Head To The Left Then Again To Your Right.. Repeat This Exercise When i Offer You Food…Thank Me Later

My brother, don’t fool yourself thinking that you will satisfy a
woman. Even God Himself gave them eyebrows but they shave it
and draw their own. So who are u?