Nyaa came from school and dancing.
His father wondered what made so happy and decided to ask.
Dad : Son I have never seen you in this mood for a
while now…..any good news u want to share?
Nyaa : Dad next year you won’t be buying any textbook, notebooks and writing materials…..
Dad : That’s my son, why …. did you win a Scholarship?
Nyaa : No! Dad I’m repeating the same class

A man at work calls home and his 8 years old daughter picks the phone:
“Hi honey, this is daddy. Is mommy near the phone?”
“No daddy she is upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.” The little girl quipped.
“After a brief pause daddy says, “But honey you haven’t got an uncle Paul!”
“Oh yes I do, and he is upstairs in the room with mommy right now.”
Brief pause,“ Uh okay then, this is what I want you to do: put the phone down on the table, run upstairs, knock on the bedroom door, and shout to mommy that daddy’s car has just arrived at the gate.”
“Ok daddy just a minute….”
A while later the little girl comes back to the phone, “Done it daddy.
””What happened honey?”
“Well, mommy got scared and jumped out of the bed naked, ran round the room screaming, tripped over, and knocked her head on the staircase ,now she is not moving at all.”
“What about Uncle Paul?” asked Dad. He jumped out the window into the swimming pool, but I guess he didn’t know you emptied the water last week. He hit the bottom and I think he’s dead.”
After a really long pause this time… Daddy says, “Swimming pool, but we don’t have a swimming pool! Is this 486-5731?”
“No, this is 486-5713” “Sorry wrong number….!!!!”

The awkward moment when you have crunchy food in a room full of silent people.

Being cheated on by the girl u love will humble you..,
You will find yourself asking your dog:
“Please tell me.. how do u treat your bitch?”

Even if God decided to call us in Heaven…
Some girls would ask him “Who Gave You My Number?

Mpendulo: Our teacher talks to herself does yours?

Rich:Yes, but she doesn’t realize it,
she thinks we’re actually listening!

During a class lesson the teacher ask Rich a question✔
–
Teacher: 1+1 is equal to?😐
–
Rich: 2 Madam😕
–
[ Class mates laugh and clapped their hands]
–
Rich quickly said: I’m kidding mam It’s 3😯
–
[Class died and the teacher fainted]

Kissing your bae in public is not a problem the problem start when make it sound like a car crash

The way my ex used To lie when we were daTing
IF she sent me a good morning massage
I Go outside and check iF iT really moRning

Doctor : what is your problem .
Patient: I have a bad headache with mary and 99 others

Tebza:Hi
Lebo:(last seen:12:02)
Tebza:I said hi
Lebo:(last seen:12:05)
Tebza:Are u ignoring me?
Lebo:(last seen:12:07)
Tebza:534509873236
Lebo:Which network?
Tebza:Cartoon network…

Her : bbe I Think um pregnant
Me : keep on thinking Tell me when you are pregnant.

Then she slap me whaT I have done can anyone Tell me !

Two drunks are walking along. One drunk says to the other, “What a beautiful night, look at the moon.” The other drunk stops and looks at his drunk friend. “Youre wrong, thats not the moon, thats the sun.” They began to argue when they come upon another drunk. They asked, “Sir, could you please help settle our argument? Tell us what that thing is up in the sky thats shining. Is it the moon or the sun?” The third drunk looked at the sky and said, “Sorry, I dont live around here.”

When I’m thinking of stop drinking alcohol
BuT something reminds me that my parents didn’t raise a quieter!!!!

Its hard breaking up with someone who is a psychologist✋
–
Bruh u tell them “it’s over” and they will say:
“Bae☺, sit down,
let’s talk about this,
I can see that u have family issues,
Tell me about your childhood “