Boy: It’s only six days to go.
Girl: Yeahhhhh!!! nd mmmmmh I can’t wait for that day.
Boy: Me too babe nd I just hope Liverpool beats FC Porto.
Girl: Tsek ….inja what about Valentine.

All say that love is more important than money..
Have you ever tried paying your bill with a hug.. ?

Psychiatrist: What do you do when you feel stressed?
Patient: I go to nearest Temple
Psychiatrist: Good, prayer and meditation are effective tools to reduce stress
Patient: No no no, I just mix-up all the shoes out there and watch people searching… Feels awesome.

Tebza :Hello, I would like to order some guns please.
Gunsmith :Some what? (The line is bad)
Tebza :Guns(Getting louder)
Gunsmith :Sorry, I can hardly hear, please repeat
Tebza :(Screaming )GUNS!!! G for Jeep, U for Europe, N for knowledge and S for Eskom, GUNS u stupid fool!!!

Hey, if u are reading this and u are feeling depressed, angry, sad, heartbroken etc…
I just want to tell u that I don’t care!!
Thanks!

You know girls…You can never satisfy them because you can just rob a bank for her and she goes like:
“Why did you rob CAPITEC instead of FNB?”

Rich phoned📲 his boss but get the bosses’s wife instead😯
–
She answered the phone crying: “I’m afraid he died last week”😭
–
The next day Rich calls again asking for the boss…The wife answered: “I told u yesterday, he died last week”😠
–
The next day he calls again and once more he asks to speak to his boss😯
–
By this time the wife is extremely angry😠😠😠 and she shouts ” I’VE ALREADY TOLD U TWICE, MY HUSBAND, YOUR BOSS, DIED LAST WEEK!!! WHY DO U KEEP CALLING???”😟😓
–
Rich replied laughing: “I just love hearing it…I’ll call u back again tomorrow”💪👏

There was this couple that had been married for 20 years😷
–
Everytime they made love the husband [Rich] always insisted on turning off the light🔦
–
Well after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figure she would break him out of this crazy idea😯
–
So one night while they were still in the section she turned on the light🙊🙉😨🔦
–
She looked own amd saw that Rich was holding a battery-operated pleasure device, A VIBRATOR!!! Soft, Wonderful and large. She went completely ballistic!!!😠
–
The wife with extreme anger said ” you impotent pig, how could u be lying to me after all these years!! You better explain yourself”😠
–
Rich looked at her straight in the eyes and said calmly: “I’ll Explain the toy, you explain the kids”

Teacher : “Ronnie why are you late?”
–
Ronnie : “I didn’t have my shoes”
–
Teacher : “what?? Are you stupid? Where were they?”
–
Ronnie : “I’m not stupid, one shoe was in my dad’s hand and the other one was in my mom’s hand and they were beating each other.

Girls be like:
”Harder… Harder, faster… Faster. But after
you guys break up, then you be like He used me”
🙄😯😮😶🤔
How my sister?

Two mad men decided that they have to attend school, so they collected old books and sat under a tree pretending that it was school.The following day, one got there early and climbed the tree. As the other came and saw his friend on top of the tree he asked: “What are you doing up there?”
The friend replied: “I’m in high school now!”

While seryoaong eats boknoy and Mary of lomi.
Mary: babe, I have something to say to you.
Boknoy: babe, later. Can you?
Mary: Okay, babe.
– after meals
Boknoy: babe, what are you going to tell me a while ago?
Mary: Ah, your lomi because babe has a cockroach.

Yesterday i introduced Bae to my mom she was so happy to meet her 😊
Tomorrow am going to introduce her to another one i want to make her proud