I don’t know what’s wrong with me
but every time a girl calls me “baby”
I send her airtime 😑

Today l used RedBull instead of water
to make my cofee……
After driving on a freeway for 15 minutes
l realises that l left the car at home🏡

My roommate’s parents were here today
so before they left they gave us R500 and
said we are going to see what we will buy.
So my roomate doesn’t want to give me my R250

Before l confirm your friend
Request📲 l need:
Certified copy of your ID📂🗒
Proof of resident🌐
And your parent’s payslip

She’s complains when I give her a R200 note,
she is now asking for atleast four R50.00

Don’t be a boring girlfriend,
sometimes you must take your boyfriend to the mortuary
to show him where he belongs if you find him cheating

*Teacher: what is Jomo Cosmos.?*
*Rainbow: a team that plays so well but has nothing to show for it.*
*Teacher: very good ; so give an example.*
*Rainbow: Kaizer Chiefs is a Jomo Cosmos

Screenshots don’t scare me shame
I have denied voice notes before

Welcome to South Africa where
(1). Young girls look forward to putting their signatures on Social Grants than JOB CONTRACTS,
(2). Beer is more important than water,
(3). Arbotion is legal, yet murder is illegal,
(4). Rape and other crime rate is higher than education,
(5). Getting a smart phone is greater than achieving a degree,
(6). Beautiful girls are getting 100+ LIKES on social networks everyday, while the ugly ones are getting DEGREES and getting MARRIED every weekend,
(7). Losing a phone is more painful than losing virginity,
(8). Pizza deliveries are faster than an emergency response

Dear Future wife….
My salary is our salary…..
your salary is yours alone! 😂😂😂😂😂😂

Sezwana

It’s the thing that satisfies
ur mind, body & soul!
Do it on bed, on a sofa,
in the car or anywhere!

It’s called Prayer!
God bless ur naughty mind.

One wife and one side chick is enough for any responsible man.
No one will give you a medal for sleeping with 10 or more girls.

Dating someone who has a lot of money and cars
doesnt make you rich sis!
A Break-up can drag you right back to Default settings!!!!

Passing

Imagine someone who doesn’t buy you data,
complaining of late replies and responses.