Wamemeza u Nonhlanhla 🙍e Kfc wath “ongasidli iskhumba eslethe la”
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“Umakoti Ngowethu Siyavuma”
Igcina laphoke ✋.!! Leyokuthi
“Uzoniwashela Aniphekele” Udoti
Senihlanyela Umkami👎
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Ngimanzi nteee! Kade ngithelwa ngamanzi bengivusa sengiqulekile, ngizwa kuthiwa iEX yami ithenge amaTAXI awu6 namaGolf awu3 kanti basho amakhekhe
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An old man wanted to leave all of his money to one of his three sons, but he didn’t know which one he should give it to. He gave each of them a few coins and told them to buy something that would be able to fill their living room. The first man bought straw, but there was not enough to fill the room. The second bought some sticks, but they still did not fill the room. The third man bought two things that filled the room, so he obtained his father’s fortune. What were the two things that the man bought?
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Imagine tufike mbinguni halafu tupate kukula cuzo haikua Dhabi!!
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I will be naming my daughter pregnant so when a guy meets her.
Guy: Hi, am Stanley
Her: Hi, am pregnant. 😂 case closed🙌🤣😋
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KARUMAINDO BAR NOTCE in Nyeri.
1. Ukifanya ornder, unaturia, usichide umekubucha kubucha waiter, yeye ni mutu msima anakubuka.
2. Ukirewo urewe peke yako, usianse kuiba nyibo sa Kigooco huku. Ukitaka kuiba eda clusade.
3. Huku hakuna dancing froor. Kwa hifo usika dance huku, hii ni bar, sio carnivorous(Carnivore)
4. Urinal siko. Kukonjoa ni sawa. Ukitaka hanja kumbwa, marisa fobe yako uede ukakumie kwako. Huku hakuna shoo. Tunauzaga fobe si Ugari.
5. Kufugia waiter jisho uwashe. Unamfugia jisho kwani umeskia ni daktali wa masho.
6. Ukinunuria waiter fobe, sio kumaanicha ati utaeda na yeye kwako. Ako hapa kuusa fobe, sio kuusa mwiri, mununurie na uthie ukiumaga
7. Usikamwaga mwage fobe kwa mesa,, tumekataa! Urinunua ukunywe ama umwage, tumia kogocity!
8. Huku hakuna Maraya. Ukitaka maraya kunja na wako, na akuwe maraya anaereweka tafathari sio chula inakaa mutura bishi
9. Wakati Mike Lua ama Salim Junia anaiba, tafathari uskakaibaniche na yeye. NYAMASA tulii,, watu warikunja kusikisa Lua, sio wewe. Ukitaka kuiba, tuabie tukutafutie Saturnday yako.
10. Kuchika chika waiter matako ni hatia! Chika matako yako, huku si bedloom.
11. Maneno ya CORND na JUBIREE perekeni Fesbuk. Sio hapa!!!Laila sio Waiter hapa
12. Kuwekewo mchere kwa fobe si kitu kumbwa, ukiwekew, unaitoa na unaederea na Fobe yako kama kawaida.wegine wamechawai wekewo mahidi na wanasurfife tu
13. HAKUNA kurara kwa Mesa! Mesa sio kitada. Kama umerewo, eda ukarare kwako.
14. Ukiibiwo pesa eda ukastaki kwa borithi, usikakunje kusubua Manager.
15. Tip ni rasma! Kama besa yako haitochi ya tip, rasima birr irete chinda ama ununue fobe take away ukakunywie kwako.
16. Huku hakuna bouncer! Rakini ukireta nyokonyoko tutakunyorocha kama Mukola.
17. Usikatapike huku. Hii ni Bar, sio Crinic ya watoto. Unatapika kwani uko na Miba??chidwo!!
By MANANGEMEN
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*Girl;* babe leo hakuna magari nalala kwa beshte yangu nikam kesho🙂
*boy;* poa hun, hata monica beshte yako ako hapa akuna gari anadoz akungoje ukam kesho🤓
*Girl;* 😳bby kuna gari nimeona hapa ya takataka acha nione ka itanibeba
😆😆😅😅😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
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My future wife si uje ama nifungue butchery na hizi ngombe za dowry
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You can’t drink wine if you don’t know English coz every sip you must say ‘ as I was saying’
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Some married men will be watching Match in the bar with their side chick and still be screaming that the referee is cheating 😂 😂
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Imagine umelala afternoon bcoz the previous night ulikuwa kesha. mara unasika knock kwa mlango, ukienda kufungua unagongwa kidole ya mwisho ya mguu na kitanda, kuturn kidogo unaangukia ndoo za maji yanamwangika, unatereza kwa hayo maji unaangukia tv, na wire ya stima inakupinga shock kwa mgongo. unasimama na uchovu, maumivu, hasira na hasara. kufika kwa mlango kufungua unapatana na jamaa kwa mlango anasema, ” Habari yako? naregister lines za Orange!” utafanya? 😂😂
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Today was the day I decided to be serious about life, I took a step that many of my friends can’t take. I went for HIV Testing and I came back very HAPPY because I found the Clinic closed…
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Some guys be calling their girlfriends “My Queen! My Queen!!” but when the Queen asks for 2k the kingdom scatter and the king disappears.
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Panya watatu walikua wakibishana nani Ni noma zaidi
Panya 1: jamani mimi ni noma Wiki hii nimekula rat rat(sumu ya panya) mara tatu na sijadedi !!!
Panya 2 Wewe unasema nini, mimi nimekula nyama ikiwa
kwa mtego mara 5 nasijawahi dakwa
RAT 3 Mmemaliza? Mie hata sijui mnabishana nini? Mimi hii mimba niliyo nayo ni ya paka !!!
.
.Panya WA 1 na 2 wakazimia😆😆😆😆😆
Panya wa 3 huwa hapendi ujinga kabisa
😁😁😁😂😂😂
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*As u pray for a good wife, also pray she have good friends too because those idiots are the Board Of Directors 😂😂😂😂
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