Skebhe : baby come to my place tonight, otherwise

Zodwa : what?

Skebhe : ngidl’upolony

Yazi uPolony Ngathi Singawudlisa Legenge eFebayo uThi
“Woza La Bae Khamisa Ngikfake’swidi” Gxi Polony

The struggle of pronouncing “Listeriosis” still
continues in south africa Police Stations
Bathi “isifo sa polony”
yin yona leyo sifo sapoloni

Some relationships though
Him: Bbe fon yam ayifun ukusebenza
Her: Ifana nawe njena

Kuthwa omunye ubaba wayelenhliziyo embi so uNkulunkulu wathi kuye qamba into ofuna ngkwenzele yona then umakhelwane wakho ngzomenzela double of whatever ozabe ukuqambile ubaba lwana wacabanga imota wabona ukuthi umakhelwane wakhe uzathola 2 wathi ngitsho wacabanga indlu wabona futhi ukuthi akwenzi wathi hayi Nkulunkulu ngcono ungkhiphe ilihlo

Ungabuzi indlela emuntwini okhuluma isiTshangane. Ngeke ufike la oya khona.
.
Ungezwa ethi “Famba straight itafika lahaya,iku ehh,iku ihh,iku ohh,ifamba futhi ifika lahaya iku ohh, iku ahh,iku ehh,iku ihh,ifamba ilanguta kathlelo rasinene itavona gate ro bhasa hingena…”

Inkulumo zaboMama abathanda imithi.

1. Mandlovu ubusuke wezwa ukuthi kulomphrofitha omutsha eNketha? Lowo bathi uyakutshela indaba zakho.

2. Indoda yakhe leyana eyayibheda bathi wayichumisa ngomuthi kaMamhlanga.

3. Inyanga yeNtumbane ivele ihle ithi buya lamapikitsha akhe.

4. Ugogo lowana okhupha izisu bathi ubhubhile angazi ukuthi uMamo nzamusa ngaphi bantu.

5. Ubohlakanipha Makhumalo uziqinise lawe uzathathelwa indoda ngama slay queen.

6. Lawe uyathatha i andaweya yakhe abeyiqgokile uhambe layo kuKhulu uyakulungisela konke.

7. Ubaba lowana oweTshabalala sedula njani kulezi insuku.

8. Mina ngadlisa umuzi wonke konke lomamazala yikho ungibona ngihlezi pekle.

9. Madube kanje umuthi lowana kwathiwa ngibowuthunqisela nxa sokutheni?

10. Eminye imithi liboyisebenzisa kancane mankazana, manje yini umntanabantu eseyisiyelele esenjani.

11. Mina maNcube ngivumile, imithi iyasebenza, mbani owayengatsho ukuthi uNgwenya angacina setshade lemvubu leyana.

12. Umama yenowana kuthwa wayezama ukudlisa indoda yemalawi wahle wahlanya.

13. Ungahambisi iyembe yonke khupha okuluhali kuphela wena.

14. Nxa ufuna engakutshiyi msebenze.

15. Okwakhe sokwamlungela yikho kulezi insuku esesenza engathi umuthi wawuthola echurch.

16. Umphrofethi lowana ulobutsotsi, last wangikhulekela wangibamba.

17. Maphosa ngilayela lapho okulenyanga eqinileyo khona isifebe lesana singakachithi umuzi wami.

18. Uyasebenza wena umuthi lowana, indoda itshiye ipay yonke bandla.

19. Kuthwa umuthi wokufeba engabanjwa wawuphiwa ngunina ongumthakathi.

20. Engavele elale lawe kasakutshiyi futhi

21. Itshuni kagogo lowa maMoe ngiyayivuma shame ibopha ngcii iskhala ubuye nguchuphele

My wife took my📱phone and deleted Dineo’s number and saved her number as Dineo.
You see, someone had tipped my wife off about my Dineo. I then got an SMS from Dineo asking for airtime. I rushed to the spaza, bought the airtime, and sent it to Dineo. She did not acknowledge receipt of the airtime.
When I was relaxing at home after work, I kept wondering if Dineo had received the airtime. I sent her an SMS to find out if she had received the airtime. Her response was, “Call me now”.
I got out of the house to make the call.
Me:(whispering) Neo baby zkhiphani?
My wife:”Futsek ngena endlini”. Ngisami phandle lamanje ngingene njani endlini kodwa?

Title: Idonki eyahlula ukufa
Kwa kulenye inkosi eya iledonki eyayilithanda kakhulu ngoba lalilallela kakhulu . Leli donki lalithunywa asigayweni lodwa . Lalibhalelwa incwajana kufakwe lemali pakathi kwesaka lomumbu balifake emhlane beselihamba .kwathi ngelinye ilanga lawela egodini elitshonayo kakhulu.Inkosi yaqeda amaviki ambili ifuna leli donki .Kwathi sokuphele isikhathi balithola kodwa laselizvile yindlala.Yazama ngayoyonke indlela inkosi ukulikupha kodwa kwehlula . Yathi inkosi ezinduneni zayo lidgibeleni ngoba sesehlulekile ukulisiza ukuma . Baqala ukulidgibela . Idonki lalithi nxa bethela inhlabathi lizithintithe linyathenyathele inhlabathi leyana . Lokhu kwenzeka okwesikhathi eside igodi laze lagcwala idonki lingadgibelekanga laphuma
Sihlobo sami kuyafana lempilo . Kungenzeka usuhlangane nezilingo ezinkulu kangakanani ngithi qinisela uzaphuma kulelo godi. Kungaba yimali, yindoda, ngufazi okuhluphayo, kungaba ngumsebenzi, ingabe yikugula subhekane lokufa, qinisela unkulunkulu usakuthanda. Thintitha izilingo uzinyathenyathele ngusathani ufuna ukukuwisela ekufeni
✍🏿………………………🙏🏿
Nxa ukuzwisisa thumela omunye leli izwi uNkulunkulu asisize

Husband asks wife:
Who took the money I left on the dressing
table?:
.
Whites: I didn’t take it
.
Blacks: Ubani? Mina? Imali? Ngaphi? Nini?
Dressing table? Uyahlanya.!!

Guy : hey dear…
Girl :hey…
Guy :u Right ?
Girl : yes u…?
Guy :am cool..ubani igama lakho ?
Girl : elika Facebook,Mxit or elamampela?
Guy : elamampela dear..
Girl : nick name or elikwi I.D ?
Guy : elikwi I.D
Girl :1st name or second ?
Guy : mxm! Vele undinike i number
yakho ke…
Girl : account number,I.D number or
cell number ?
Guy : nditsho i cell number.
Girl : eka MTN,Cell C okanye u
Vodacom ?
Guy : MTN dear
Girl : 073,078 or 083 ?
Guy : 078…
Girl : ndiknike le ye Nokia okanye eye blackberry or eye sumsang ?
Guy : ndinike eye black berry girl…
Girl : torch,curve or i bold ?
Guy : (pissed) hay suka yeka maan
xa ungafuni sfebe
Girl : manje ukwatile or awuna
air time?
(gilikiqi phansi the guy “collapsed)…
Girl : owh!…yini manje ukhathele
uyalala noma ufile ?

Ubaba ujikisile ukhuluma lomntanakhe..
Baba: this is my house I can’t tolerate such nonsense
Mtwana: u r ryt this is my father’s house angitshelwa okokwenza nxa kukubhowa hamba kwekayihlo lawe

Uzwe isdudla sithi “I miss my other half”,
ubusuzibuza ukuthi kanti lesdudla kahle kahle singanani ma sesiphelele?

Social grant it’s R400
Pampers R280
Formula R300
Yewena Ramaphosa iyashota lemali😂😂😂😂