A sweet grandmother Telephoned St. Joseph’s Hospital. She timidly asked, “Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?” The operator said, “I’ll be glad to help, dear. What’s the name and room number of the patient?” The grandmother in her weak, tremulous voice said, Norma Findlay, Room 302.”
The operator replied, “Let me put you on hold while I check with the nurse’s station for that room.”After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said, “I have good news. Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing well. Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back normal and her Physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged tomorrow.” The grandmother said, “Thank you. That’s wonderful. I was so worried. God bless you for the good News.” The operator replied, “You’re more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter?” The grandmother said, “No, I’m Norma Findlay in Room 302. No one tells me anything.”
Little Jack was filling a hole in the garden when his neighbour looked over the fence and asked, “What are you doing here, son?” “I’ve just buried my goldfish; it died” replied Little Jack tearfully. “That is a mighty large hole you dug for a goldfish” said the neighbour.Patting down the last bit of earth, Little Jack said, “That’s because my goldfish is inside your stupid cat !”
A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week, so the magician did the same tricks over and over again. There was one problem. The captain’s parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick. Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show “Look, it’s not the same hat!” or, “Look, he’s hiding the flowers under the table,” or “Hey, all the cards the ace of spades?” The magician was furious, but couldn’t do anything. It was, after all, the captain’s parrot. Then the ship sank. The magician found himself on a piece of wood in the middle of the sea with, as fate would have it, the parrot. They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word. This went on for a day and then another and then another.
Finally on the fourth day, the parrot could not hold back and said,
“OK, I give up. Where’s the ship?”
When you finally think you found the one…
.
Waiter: Would you like to eat something
sir?
Him: Nah thanks
Waiter: You madam?
Her: Bring two nah thanks and water
please
I got into the betting room and said to the
people who were inside not to bet,why
guessing money go find proper job.
I was surprised to see myself in the
hospital.
The idiots almost killed me
When you receive your salary…
You begin eating chicken,
When the salary begin declining you eat
chicken products (eggs)
when it continues ending up you eat
chicken food( millet,maize).
After the whole salary finish you now
become chicken itself..moving around
looking for what to eat..
5 DEADLY WORDS USED BY WOMEN.
(1) FINE- is a word used to end an
argument when she knows she is right
and u nid to shut up.
(2) NOTHING- means something, you need
to be worried.
(3). GO AHEAD- this is a dare, not
permission, dont do it.
(3). WHATEVER- is a woman’s way of saying
“screw you”
(5) THATS OK- she is thinking long and
hard on how and when you wil pay for
your mistake…
Pliz dont try this at home!
BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE MINISTRY OF
HEALTH
My brother if you ever meet a beautiful,
loyal & focused girl with goals and a great
smile and you feel like she’s the typa girl to
cuff, don’t waste any time,Please give her
my number
