My brother, if her phone rings and she stares at you before picking …
Just know that your assistant is calling

People ask me why I give the best relationship advice but yet am still single,

So I tell them “coaches don’t play

HIM: Eish bae, these days it’s too cold. Tjo!! I hate Winter time, so you? which time do you like?
.
HER: I like Airtime!!

A Preacher finished the service one morning by saying, ‘Next Sunday, I am going to preach on the subject of liars.
As a preparation for my sermon, I would like you all to read Mark Chapter 17.’
On the following Sunday, the preacher rose to begin. Looking out at the congregation he said, ‘Last week I asked you all to read Mark Chapter 17. If you have read the chapter, please raise your hand.’ Nearly every hand in the congregation went up.
Smiling, the preacher said, ‘You are the very people I want to talk to today.. the liars ……. Mark has only 16 chapters.’
God have Mercy.

Please live your lives in such a way that we
are not forced to lie at your funerals.

Black parents only start to talk to you
about the danger of unprotected sex
when you tell them that your girlfriend is
pregnant

When a girl rejects me , I tell my self that
she’s HIV positive and she doesn’t want to
infect me…

If you’re addicted to drugs and you tell yourself to Stop,
are you really gonna listen to a Drug Addict?

Grandpa
Go hide ur Teacher is here because you
didn’t go to school today.
Boy.. No you go hide Grandpa I told her
u were dead..

Girls though 😭
12:00 i’m coming
14:00 I’m leaving the house now
16:00 I’m in a taxi
18:00 sorry can’t make it, Mom says i must cook

I think FM stands for free mode.
That’s why radios don’t show pictures.

Some people write Xmas because they can’t write creasmas.
We see you.

Good sex will make a girl return the next
day uninvited with poor excuses like ” I left
my used recharge voucher yesterday “

As a lady you must respect your
boyfriend’s friends, they’re the ones who
know if you’re his girlfriend or not.