Relationship stress can make you lose weight,
I lost 9 kilometres in two days

Dear ladies, if ur man doesn’t reply ur text immediately just know that he is either sleeping or reading d bible… Men don’t cheat

those who buy thier kids toy motorbike please tell me
.
.
.
.who’s baby u expect to push your kid????

Some People Should Be Glad That Mirrors Don’t Laugh

Another weekend is passing by, Your friends are getting married
nd you are still there claiming that all Men are player’s..
Keep waiting You will marry the referee

I remember once when my dad gave me money to pay the electricity bill but instead i bought a lottery ticket for a brand new car. When i got home,i explained to my dad what i did and he beat the crap out of me. But the next day,when my dad woke up and opened the door, outside my house was a brand new car. We all cried especially me, because the car was from the electricity company, they were there to cut off the electricity, my dad beat the crap out of me again

My brother
.
Just because she cheated on you doesn’t mean you have to cheat back in order to settle the score. Be a leader not a follower

teacher: anyone who thinks they are stupid stand up..”Nobody stands”
Teacher: I’m sure there are some stupid students in the class”
Little Jonny stands”
teacher: oh little Jonny so u think u are stupid??
Little Jonny: no mam I just felt bad because u were standing alone

I was attending a Wedding ceremony with a gathering of about 500 people… I decided to take the front seat as usual, Then a lady started distributing food from the back but unfortunately the food din’t get to the front seats… Another Lady started sharing drinks she started from the front seat but unfortunately i had already moved to back because of what happened with the first Lady nd yet again, the drinks din’t get to the back sits… ” furious😠😠 i stood up, as i was about to leave, another Lady showed up with a Bowl ” I decided to satay, but this time i wasn’t going to let the food pass me by So stayed in the Middle 😍😊… I was so happy when i saw the Lady approaching me nd still Holding the Bolw which appeared to be full of something😊😊😊… Then The Lady Lowered the Bowl😍😍😍, Then Booom!!! only to find out that she was handing out toothpick’s

Dear Single Nd beautiful Ladies: i want to tell you the Bitter truth😥
That 500 nd above likes you always get chases a potential future husband away

What is Reunion? Reunion is when you tell your Wife you are going to work nd you go to your neighbour’s Wife to make love with her.. Her Husband comes back, knocks on the door!!😨 You go hide under the bed😥 The wife Start feeling the pressure nd decides to go to the market to buy some food items.. Then the husband takes advantage of his Wife’s absence nd decides to call your Wife😨.. She comes over nd they make Love.. The other Woman forget the list she made for the food she’s going to buy… She knocks on the door, Your Wife panics nd decides to hide under the bed where you hiding😨😨 Now that’s what we call REAL REUNION

My girlfriend is so dramatic,
she says i have trust issues because she saw me counting Money
after withdrawing at the ATM, Like W

Guy’s with strong Relationships,
where do you all get the Building Material

Leaving University Res to Home:

1. There are no showers at home😭
2. There is no Free WIFI 😭
3. They’ll wake you up at 7am for no particular reason😭
But You will eat as much as you please… no budget😂
You leave the house and come back to a cooked meal..
Students often get mixed emotions at this time of the year

SCHOOL FACTS:In every class, there is a
1. The thief.
2. The shy guy.
3. The three best friends.
4. The back seat guys with joke.
5. The Nerd that never gets High mark.
6. The clean guys.
7. The gossip square with low marks.
8. The late comer.
9. The student that always turn out to be thefirst
to come to class.
10. The cute guy who doesn’t wantanything to
do with girls.
11. The High IQ’s
12. The pastor.
13. The talkative .
14. The one always with the annoying laugh.
15. The guy that is always in the midst ofgirls.
16. The girl always in the midst of guys.
17. The tutor.
18. The perfume crew.
19.The copier.
Give a number to yourself…. No lie

That Pain , When You Ask For Your Charger Back And
They Say “What Percent Are You On?”