Difference between talent and God’s gift:
A Teacher can give lecture for 2 hrs on any subject.
-This is talent.
A wife can give lecture for 2 hrs without any subject.
-This is God’s gift.

How to survive January

1) date a taxi driver for free ride to work

2) attend each and every funeral in your hood for a free plate

3) borrow meat from your neighbours and make soup and take it back

4) stay away from broke girls or niggas even he/she is your xondile

5) use one teabags at least 3× before you throw it away

6) use a taxi to work and save petrol

7) mix water with sugar to make a drink

8) try to use prostitutes for sexual needs to avoid imali yekhanda and unnecessary use of money

*Quote of the day:*
*Having an ugly friend is not a problem ..
The problem is when people start asking,
“Are you twins ?

Rich having a convo with his crush😉
–
Rich: Hi☺
–
Her: hi, how was u doing?😮
–
Rich: Im fine…😀
–
Her: where did u born?😑
–
Rich: where did i born? How?😨
–
Her: Don’t be stupid😐…where did u borned yourself?😠
–
Rich: Come again😯
–
Her: which come?😟
–
Rich: I mean repeat again😕
–
Her: I said where did your borning begin?😠
–
Rich: Im confused😐
–
Her: Jeez! OK! Born! Born! Your mom’s bottom drop u out u cry “Nywe Nywe Nywe”😢…Place! Where your mom borneth u!😠😠
–
Rich is still looking for a safe place where he can faint

Drink alcohol , but please remember that next year ” SAME GRADE different Year

TYPICAL AFRICAN
1: When making a call their finger is always on
the
end button, ready to cut the call.
2: Always check the airtime balance after each
call.
3: After cooking they always put the used
cooking
oil back in the bottle or cup for future use.
4: Empty coffee tins are used for storing sugar
&
salt.
5: When they boil milk they add water to
increase
its volume,
6: Empty mazoe & soft drink bottles are used
for
storing water in the fridge.
7: No matter how cheap something is they will
always ask for the price to be reduced.
8: If the bus conductor forgets to collect the
bus
fare they will also keep quiet till they get off.
9: When they buy mineral water they will not
throw
away the empty bottle instead they will just
refill it
with tap water
10. when they withdraw cash on ATM, they
recount the
cash in order to verify it.
11. If they buy meat or something delicious
they put in a transparent bag yet when buy
vegetables they put
them in black bag and use short-cuts
Am I lying?
How many shares?

China had invented a machine that catches thieves; they took it out to different countries for a test.
In US, in 30 minutes, it caught 20 thieves;
UK, in 30 minutes it caught 500 thieves;
Spain, in 20 minutes it caught 25 thieves;
Swaziland, in 10 minutes it caught 6,000 thieves;
Zimbabwe in 7 minutes it caught 20,000 thieves;
South Africa, in 5 minutes the machine was stolen.

Classy girls don’t have any tattoos Because no one can intentionally scratch a Benz or a private jet
If you have tattoos, you are probably a rubbish lorry or kombi