A man dies. In heaven he sees a large Wall full of Clocks. He asks angel: “What are these for?” Angel answers: “These are Lie Clocks, every person has a lie clock! Whenever u lie on earth, clock moves.” The man points towards a clock and asks: Whose clock is this? … Angel says: its Mother Teresa’s. It never moved, showing that she never told lie. The man asks: “Where are the clocks of our Zimbabwean girls?” The angel replies: Those are in our office, We use them as *OFFICE FANS*

WELCOME TO THE 21TH CENTURY!!!
*Our Phones ~ Wireless
*Cooking ~ Fireless
*Cars ~ Keyless
*Food ~ Fatless
*Tyres ~ Tubeless
*Dress ~ Sleeveless
*Youth ~ Jobless
*Leaders ~ Shameless
*Relationships ~ Meaningless
*Atitude ~ Careless
*Wives ~ Fearless
*Babies ~ Fatherless
*Feelings ~ Heartless
*Education ~ Valueless
*Children ~ Mannerless
*Women ~ Pantieless
Everything is becoming LESS but
still our hopes are ~ Endless.
Infact am ~ Speechless

Repeating clothes doesn’t mean you are poor
but it shows that you are the owner

People In The Taxi Are So Kind
Today I Just Stretched My Arms ,
They Gave Me A Roll-On
Then When I Say ”Thank You”
They Gave Me A Mint!🍬

I went for a job interview the other day. They asked me what my greatest weakness was.
I replied, “I tend to ask too many questions, why do you ask?

I’ve had a letter from police saying they want to interview me.
Which is strange thing coz I’ve never applied for a job with them💁😣

I Want a Girl Who Will understand that I Won’t Even spend a cent on her..! 👌

Some of you also wanted to be slay queens
but your face didn’t just cooperate

Need to stop texting when am drunk,
am back with 3 of my ex’s🙇

The pain of opening a
“I need a favour” message by mistake😩

Having 3 girlfriends is so tough,
you gotta tell everything 3 times

When they see you happy with your partner,
they start telling them about what you did in 1996🤐🤐🤐

No school😐, No career😐 ,No job😐 ,No talent😐 , Just phone😎 , tattoos😐, leggings,high waist jeans and crop top, Yet you want to be loved for who you are?
LEMME TELL YOU,
.
.
.
You don’t need Jesus alone . You need Jesus … Luke… Mathew … Moses …, Peter …, John …and all of his disciples. You might also need Judas Iscariot.😂